The Hills

Lyrics

[Intro: Mark Douglas as The Weeknd] Ugh Oy Ow [Verse 1: The Weeknd] Yo man I'm the world's worst Uber driver Crashed the car and there were no survivors I probably won't receive a five star rating Makes me sing like a sad pouty baby Now these girls will never make it to prom Them bitches said my head looked like two pom poms Turned around to yell, I lost control then Flipped the car and now it has exploded [Chorus: The Weeknd, Kristen Taylor as Club Girl] This song's about treating women like shit And somehow it got past the feminists It doesn't matter if it's sexist or un-PC that I trеat girls like feces Doеsn't mean much if it's catchy That's my jam! I only sing about cocaine and sex It's R&B with freaky sound effects I only call you at 5:30 which is early So this part's not that creepy Cause I'm punctual, that's the real me, yeah [Verse 2: The Weeknd, Mark Douglas as Granny, Sam Nulton as Super High Weeknd vocals] This is just a role and I'm an actor On the weeknds I work as a pastor Me and my fiancée are quite boring We go on nature walks then watch Our Stories I just washed the dishes fore I saw you I bought you a latte and some perfume Let's go out to brunch and to a day spa Then we'll go play Bingo with your grandma-a-a, a-a-a! Bingo! [Chorus: The Weeknd] But when I sing I have to call you bitch Cause there's so many words that rhyme with bitch Now every popstar is just bragging about fucking Cause we're dummies in our twenties And we all have tattoo sleeves, yeah I only call you when my car's on fire Do you know how to change a burning tire? I am like the next Marvin Gaye or MJ If they cursed more than Kanye I can moonwalk on cocaine Woo! [Bridge: The Weeknd, Mark Douglas as The Waitress] It comes with fries, it comes with fries Or a vegetable Or a baked potato I'll have fries on the side And we'll take the check I've got a car to wreck [Skit: Voltaire Wade-Greene as The Weeknd, Paige Grimard as The Fiancé, Both] Goodbye honey, I have to go be The Weeknd Oh, but it's only Tuesday, dear *Laughing* Good one, muffin I can't feel my face when I'm with you Oh, don't forget your cocaine, dear