Best Friends Song

Lyrics
Stephen: Mark has been my best friend for many years now, and I wrote a song- Mark: About one Stephen: ...that's a lot of months. I wrote a song to celebrate what I think is our greatest asset as friends, and that's our complete and utter differences. We're total opposites when it comes to almost everything Mark: Completely Stephen: So I wrote a song, and we're gonna sing it for you now Mark: Gay. Not gay. Just one thing. It's this shirt, isn't it? Alright, I'm the gay one Stephen: Thank you! I didn't wanna out you in front of everybody Mark: I like my toast buttered Stephen: And I like mine dry Mark: I dig the Beatles Stephen: I'm a 'Stones kinda guy Mark: I have fine taste Stephen: And I like things cheap Mark: I wanna stay up all night Stephen: I just wanna sleep... with your sister! Mark: I'm sorry, what did you just say? Stephen: What? Mark: No, you just said something about you want to sleep with my- Mark: I like the sunshine Stephen: And I wanna nail your sister Mark: See there, you just said it again. I like Julia Roberts movies Stephen: I just wanna F*** the S*** out of your sister! Stephen: Well Tyke, you would rule, if you'd say "It's cool" Mark: What are you talking about? It's not cool! Stephen: I'd go pick her up at her Jr. High School! Mark: Woah! Hey! That Sister? NO! Stephen: Yeah! I wanna F*** your sister! I just wanna F*** in her F***ing face and C** all over her hair and stick it in her eyeball and- Mark: Hey! No! OH MY GOD! You can't skull F*** my sister! Mark: Hey, hey, woah! Wait a minute! Stephen: What? Mark: Woah, goddamit! Stephen: What??? Mark: You wanna F*** my sister? Stephen: Yes Mark: You wanna F*** my SISTER? Stephen: Yes! Mark: *pause* $26.50
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Credits
- Writers
- Stephen Lynch