Beelz

Album cover art for "Beelz" by Stephen Lynch

Stephen Lynch - Rap

Beelz

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Lyrics

I figured since I wrote a song about you know God and Jesus and all that I'd have to give the uh, opposition equal time [Verse 1] Ever since first man has walked this earth I have been here To whisper seeds of doubt and evil thoughts into his ear I am the beast, the outcast angel fallen from on high I go by many names, but there is one you can't deny My name is Satan Hi everybody Uh, let me tell you a little bit about myself [Verse 2] My friends all call me old scratch And I am a Capricorn My turn-ons are romantic walks and killing the unborn I've got little devil horns and a little goatee And little devil eyes to help a little devil see And little cloven hooves make it kinda hard to ski I'm Satan Woohoo Mephistopheles for some, I don't know [Verse 3] My real name is Beelzebub But you can call me Beelz I love to watch Fox News then go club some baby seals Then I'll take a bubble bath and drink a Zinfandel Try to wash off that baby seal smell And then I'll make a toast to me Hey, here's to my heal- Th [Verse 4] My name is Satan To carry on my evil ways I went and had a son And now he makes his living as a singing comedian I'm in every Zeppelin album, I'm in all Rush Limbaugh's rants I'm the reason that the Boston Red Sox even had a chance And if I want to eat your soul I'll just throw it on the griddle No need to make a deal I don't need to tell a riddle And fuck Charlie Daniels I don't care if you can fiddle I'm Satan Devil went down to Georgia he was looking for a soul to steal That's fucking bullshit because I would not be caught dead in Georgia Okay, it's like oh my God Six six six Satan [Outro] Look that's just how I picture him, you fucking think of whatever you want

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