Double Standards Inc.

Song Meaning

Robert Pollard, as usual, presents us with a puzzle box in "Double Standards Inc.", a miniature drama painted with cryptic imagery and a sneering cynicism. The opening lines, "At 90 degrees Kansas sinks into a fine red hue / The same place the fly got smashed," immediately evoke a sense of stifling heat and casual destruction. Kansas, often a symbol of Middle American values, is being metaphorically baked, perhaps suggesting a moral decay under the surface of normalcy. The smashed fly? Collateral damage. The scent of money hangs heavy, setting the stage for the song's central theme: hypocrisy. "Double standards, honey," Pollard drawls, laying bare the inherent contradictions of a system built on unequal footing. It's a world where rules are bent, and ethics are negotiable, depending on who's holding the power. The song meaning here is about the rot that festers when profit motives trump genuine integrity. The "equal opportunity investment seminar" is a particularly pointed jab. Pollard isn't just criticizing overt corruption; he's skewering the performative wokeness of corporate culture. The line "Talk precisely when you're gunning / The tape machine's not running" suggests that true intentions are masked by carefully crafted rhetoric. It's a world where appearances matter more than substance, and where the game is rigged from the start. The drive for advancement and profit, the \'gunning,\' is only done without recording when it is time to be dishonest or exploitative. This analysis of the lyrics reveals a deep distrust of institutions that claim to offer a level playing field. Ultimately, "Double Standards Incorporated!" is a sardonic battle cry. The characters in Pollard's vignette—the "equally sharp minds" in the fields, the one who "smells dynamite"—are not necessarily heroes. They are players in a game, some more willing to embrace the inherent amorality than others. The quick gimmick, the 5-to-1 odds, and the willingness to fight suggest a desperate scramble for survival in a system that rewards ruthlessness. Pollard isn't offering solutions or moral judgments; he's simply holding up a mirror to the absurdity and corruption of a world where double standards are not a bug, but a feature.