I Wrote the Book

Lyrics
[TESS] To name me Woman of the Year Wasn't what you'd call a fluke I understand I won it in a breeze So, the ladies should be thrilled Their expectations are fulfilled As I'm broadening my field of expertise I wrote the book on how to be cool I wrote the book on how to be strong I wrote the book on how to interpret the news And never be wrong I wrote the book on how to be tough I wrote the book on how to be tеrse I wrote the book on еvery subtextual phrase In Eliot's verse I wrote the book on how to have class I wrote the book on how to have clout I wrote the book on reading government pamphlets And doping them out So when it comes to losing a man You'll find it unsurprisingly true That last week I wrote that book, too [Instrumental] [TESS & CLEANING WOMEN] I wrote the book On how to be brisk (Doot doo doo doot doo) I wrote the book On how to be bright (Doot doo doo doot doo) I wrote the book On seeing New Delhi by day (Doot doo doo doot doo) And Cairo by night (Doot doo doo doot doo) I wrote the book On how to be chic (Doot doo doo doot doo) I wrote the book On how to be smart (Doot doo doo doot doo) I wrote the book On how to evaluate trends (Doot doo doo doot doo) In fashion and art I wrote the book On how to have style (Doot doo doo doot doo) I wrote the book On wisdom and wit (Doot doo doo doot doo) I wrote the book On every great English statesman (Doot doo doo doo) From Churchill to Pitt (Doot doo doo doo doo) So when it comes to losing a man (Doo, doo) You'll find it unsurprisingly true (Doo, doo) That last week I wrote that book too So when it comes to losing a man (Oo-oo-oo-oo-) It should be unsurprising to you To note that I wrote that book too
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