Love is Blind (March of the Falsettos)

Lyrics

[MENDEL] Sit down, my dear I hear you have a problem I'm sure you're not disgusting or indiscreet Take a load off your feet [TRINA] Love is a mess So's my son, expressly to hurt me Marvin, my ex- You've seen him for years- Told me over the phone to tell you my fears Do you only treat queers? [MENDEL] Breathe deep, my dear You'll find me understanding Your pain is a priori Unfold your untold story Now to break bread Loosen your glands Put your heads in my hands [TRINA] I'm everything he wanted It's time I put it all together The date was set My father let me marry I married, I- Then Marvin came from work Sat me down on the bed He told me how he loved me how he needed and/or valued me I had- [MENDEL] Yes? [MARVIN] Syphilis [TRINA] He said [MENDEL] Good [TRINA] I had- [MENDEL] Yes? [MARVIN] Syphilis [TRINA] It's true [MENDEL] Good [TRINA] I had something rotten Which appeared, though now it's well forgotten- [MARVIN & TRINA] Maybe darling, so do you [TRINA] I am probably diseased [MENDEL] You're a lovely girl [TRINA] And so easily appeased [MENDEL] What a lovely girl! Though you're probably diseased- [TRINA] He took pains to not excite us He explained I've- [MARVIN] Hepatitis [TRINA] Too [MEN] Hepa-hepa-hepatitis Hepatitis, hepatitis [MENDEL] Love is blind Love can tell a million stories Love's unkind Spiteful in a million ways [TRINA] Then I stayed home from work Took good care of my men They faked despair, they wet their bed They combed their hair, they acted dead One said- [MENDEL] Yes? [JASON] Daddy is a prick [MENDEL] What? [TRINA] He said- [MENDEL] Yes? [JASON] Daddy isn't mine [MENDEL] Good [TRINA] He filled my coats with candies and notes with [TRINA & MARVIN] Will you be my valentine? [TRINA] This gets harder to believe [MENDEL] You're a damaged girl [TRINA] I've a scalpel up my sleeve [MEN] What a damaged girl [MENDEL] Do not ever slit your wrists [TRINA] I've missed him, he's still missing Don't make noise, but Daddy's kissing Boys! [MEN] Petty, petty, petty, petty [MENDEL & TRINA] Love is blind Love can tell a million stories Love's unkind Spiteful in a million ways [ALL] Love is blind Love can tell a million stories Love's unkind Spiteful in a million ways [MARVIN] Love is crazy Love is often boring Love stinks Love is pretty often debris When you find what you find Then never, never, never, never, never do it over again Love reads like a bad biography All the names are changed to protect the innocent [ALL] Love is blind [MENDEL] My name is Mendel I treat her husband I think she's very insecure But so am I I've never married Work, work is my passion Or perhaps, that's my alibi [spoken] I don't care to discuss it [sung] I think she's charming I think she's eager That's unprofessional and mean But still it's true [ALL EXCEPT MENDEL] His name is Mendel [MENDEL] Return next Friday I admit, I admire you