Very, Very, Very

Lyrics

[MOLLY, spoken] Oh, you and your troubles Ha ha ha, ah You and your Taj Mahal, your, your town house, your country house Your fabulous collection of modern paintings And your thirty-nine million dollars in the Corn Exchange Bank I should have his troubles [MOLLY] One way to be very wealthy Is to be very, very, very rich One can pile up mink and ermine Like a hermit accumulates vermin If you occupy the proper financial niche One way to be very happy Is to be very, very, very rich There are kinds of human pleasures That are not to be purchased with treasures But I can't remember exactly which I've heard my gilded friends complain There are troubles money cannot cure But a trouble is a trouble is a trouble And it's twice the trouble When a person is poor In the carefree kingdom of the wealthy You will never see an eyebrow twitch It's a minor peccadillo To patronize the wrong pillow When you're very, very, very rich Sit down, my dear, I'll have the soup on As soon as I clip this coupon Last year I paid for the maid's appendix Now she's taken a job with Bendix It's weeks since I heard a word of gossip What's the latest from Jane and Ossip? She's a girl that dozens are the beau of She's been faithful to him twice that I know of Damn Uncle Pierpoint! He left me a packet And moved me into a higher bracket Since Sally ran off with her obstetrician Her hair's turned red and she looks like a Titian Of course, I'd hate to swear in court What kind of Titian, beaut or mort? Have you paid your platina fur tax? I am up to my neck in surtax! One way to never spend a penny Is to be very, very, very rich If you live along Park Avenue You've dandy credit, haven't you? So why pay your grocery bills and sich? In the dreamy nightlife of the wealthy True love unwinds without a hitch You just engage Menuhin To fiddle her to her ruin When you're very, very, very, very rich