Men

Lyrics

That no good shiftless, shameless, low down Chippy chasin' drugstore Indian Courtin' me while he's playing house With some snake hipped Jezebel! That beer belchin' tooth pickin' Pommade headed dog faced gulch rat I've been his dish rag, door mat And pin cushion, long enough! Of all the creatures that walk on the earth Fly in the sky and swim in the sea From Texas to Japan... From Korea to Cheyenne... The lowest in my opinion is MAN! Let me tell you about men The Almighty gave thеm just enough brains To make fools of themsеlves Men! Most of 'em have nothing, owe everybody And leave the rest to charity Men! There's only one thing in the world Worse than a man, and that's his father Men! With a woman a lie is the last resort With a man it's first aid! Men! They're the only animals that eat when they're not hungry Drink when they're not thirsty and are ready to "you-know-what" Any hour of the day or night Men! The more I think about 'em The more I like dogs Girls, the best way to fight them is with your hat Grab it and run! I've made up my mind I've made up my mind That bull throwin' Tonto Can find another squaw I still have my pride I still have my pride And possession is nine-tenths of the law I'm brushin' off that Whiskey pirate Two bit bankrupt no good Cree He two timed this one gal Just one time too much I'm unloading that free loader - And I'm hangin' a sign in my saloon And it's gonna read IN GOD WE TRUST EVERYONE ELSE PAYS CASH! I've had it up to here, d'ya hear...d'ya hear? D'ya hear? Up to here, d'ya hear?! Men! They were born to lie And women were born to believe them Men! They were invented to give women An enemy! Men! The worst advice you can give a man Is to tell him to be himself Men! The only promises men can keep Are promises they never make Sure! Tell them how good they are They'll listen for hours Tell 'em the truth and they're off In a cloud of dust Mani They're fed by cattle, clothed by sheep Protected by dogs and imitated by monkeys The way I see it they have two faults Everything they say! And everything they do! No man is manhandlin' me I'm layin' down the law! First man who dares show his face I'm showin' him the door Yes sir, this gal is sleepin' single She's through with Men She knows exactly what she Can do with men No bum in boots Is lousin' up my life To think I once thought I'd be some fella's wife Ha! I'd rather eat with hogs I'd rather sleep with skunks I'd sooner kiss a rattlesnake Than any man... Men! Men! Men! GODDAMN MEN!