Song Meaning
R. Stevie Moore's "Infallible" (Live From Brooklyn, NY - October 18, 2013)" is a masterclass in self-deprecating irony, a hallmark of his lo-fi genius. The song's core revolves around a series of counterfactuals, each beginning with the wistful phrase, "If only I was..." These aren't simple daydreams; they're layered reflections on identity, desire, and the inherent difficulty of understanding oneself. The opening lines, "If only I was a girl / And had a boy like me / I would be dying to please," immediately establish a complex dynamic, hinting at both self-love and a critical distance from his own persona. Moore isn't just wishing for a different gender; he's exploring the performative nature of desire and the internal pressures to fulfill expectations, even self-imposed ones.
The subsequent verses deepen this introspective dive. The line, "If only I was a person / Outside of myself / I would be trying to see / Into my eyes," encapsulates the struggle for self-awareness. It's a poignant expression of the human condition—the frustrating inability to objectively view oneself. The repetition of "But anyway" functions as a deflating refrain, a shrug of resignation in the face of these existential yearnings. It suggests a weary acceptance of the limitations of self-knowledge, a kind of ironic detachment that's both humorous and subtly heartbreaking.
The song then veers into absurdist territory with the lines, "If only milk was a quarter / And lids were a buck." This sudden shift disrupts the earlier, more serious reflections, highlighting Moore's playful approach to songwriting. It's a reminder that even amidst profound introspection, life is full of mundane realities and unexpected detours. The final verse, "If only I was a boy with / Nothing to think of / I would be going to school / I would learn how to love," brings the song full circle. It suggests that perhaps the very act of overthinking and self-analysis is what prevents true connection and understanding. The abrupt ending, "But anyway / I gotta go," reinforces the sense of incompleteness and the ongoing, unresolved nature of self-discovery, all delivered with R. Stevie Moore's signature blend of wit and melancholic charm. The song meaning, therefore, is a sardonic commentary on the human condition, the impossibility of truly knowing oneself, and the absurdities of everyday life.
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