Our Hero

Lyrics

[Intro: Mike E Clark, Dan Diamond] "As Doctor Griffin informed you earlier, television won't be allowed until 8 PM tonight Dinner will be served in forty-five minutes, tonight is goulash, corn, cookies and Kool-Aid "Ooh, Kool-Aid cookies! " We begin our story inside the state mental institution, where our hero was admitted He's only got four months of treatment left We join him now while he franticly tries to reach his girlfriend Rebecca [Verse 1: Shaggy 2 Dope] I been callin', she ain't pickin' up the phone It's been two weeks now she ain't been home I hang on the end and just let it ring It suddenly picked up and I heard some things Sound like fuckin', everything shook They somehow fucked the phone off the hook I can hear my bitch, "Push it in my ass! Oh, Rick hang it up fast!" I'll be out in four months, free to go But that's too long to let this grow I'm out the window, I scaled the roof Dodgin' search lights and Doctors suits Through the yard quick over the fence Fuckin' razor wire ripped my pants Into the river, up the overpass Rebecca, I'm a kill yo ass! [Chorus] Go, Shaggs, go Shaggy, go! (Go get her. Go get her) Go! Go! Go! Go! (Go get her. Go get her) Go, Shaggs, go Shaggy, go! (Go get her. Go get her) Go! Go! Go! Go! (And all the other patients said) Go, Shaggs, go Shaggy, go! (Go get her. Go get her) Go! Go! Go! Go! (Go get her. Go get her) Go, Shaggs, go Shaggy, go! (Go get her. Go get her) Go! Go! Go! Go! [Interlude: Dan Diamond] We join our hero, still in his patient pajamas Hiding outside of Rebecca's house in the bushes He plans to kill her, but he hasn't had any sex himself in over three years [Verse 2: Shaggy 2 Dope] I looked through the window, there's Rebecca Standin' there talkin' to that fuckin' pecka He's about to leave, he slaps her ass Out the front door, he walks right past me I coulda killed him, but then I couldn't He was just gettin' some neden, who wouldn't? She's the bitch slut who sold me dry I walked right in, arms open wide "Rebecca? I'm out four months early! What up with some of that beaver squirrely?" We fucked on the couch, she said "Ouch!" I dumped my nuts in her neden pouch She smiled, and said she's glad I'm home And could I excuse her to use the phone She was quick to wanna warn Rick the dick But couldn't, 'cause her throat got slit! [Chorus] Go, Shaggs, go Shaggy, go! (Go get her. Go get her) Go! Go! Go! Go! (Go get her. Go get her) Go, Shaggs, go Shaggy, go! (Go get her. Go get her) Go! Go! Go! Go! (And all the other patients said) Go, Shaggs, go Shaggy, go! (Go get her. Go get her) Go! Go! Go! Go! (Go get her. Go get her) Go, Shaggs, go Shaggy, go! (Go get her. Go get her) Go! Go! Go! Go! [Scratching] Go get her Go get her Go get her Go get her Go, go, go get her Go, go, go get her Go, go, go get her Go, go, go get her Go get her [Interlude: Dan Diamond] Returning from the store, Rebecca's lover is pulling up in the driveway. Our hero is inside fixing himself a ham and bologna sandwich over her dead body. Dodging the headlights, he moves quickly [Verse 3: Shaggy 2 Dope] Oh fuck! Ricks back with a pack of rubbers I'm in the kitchen all in the cupboards I low crawl quickly on my hands and knees I locked the dead bolt, but he had keys I took a deep breath behind the door I coulda killed him again but I spared him once more He was scratchin' a lotto ticket The whole time my blade was out, ready to stick it I was out the front before he found her dead I ran my ass off and stole the moped All the way back to the overpass In through the river, across the grass I cleared the yard but this time it was hard That fuckin' barbed wire almost left me scarred In through the window, back in bed In time for breakfast and morning meds [Chorus] Go, Shaggs, go Shaggy, go! (Go get her. Go get her) Go! Go! Go! Go! (Go get her. Go get her) Go, Shaggs, go Shaggy, go! (Go get her. Go get her) Go! Go! Go! Go! (And all my locked up homies said) Go, Shaggs, go Shaggy, go! (Go get her. Go get her) Go! Go! Go! Go! (Go get her. Go get her) Go, Shaggs, go Shaggy, go! (Go get her. Go get her) Go! Go! Go! Go! [Outro: Dan Diamond] So there you have it, our hero is safe and sound, back in his room Sporting flip flops and a hospital gown with his ass hanging out As luck would have it, Rick the dick was arrested and convicted for Rebecca's murder, and sent to death row Living proof that fucking with a killer's bitch can fuck everybody up in the long run Don't do it man, keep your dumb dick in your pants. You're better off, beating off Especially fuckin' with my bitch Fuck around, and they'll find bullet holes in your forehead