Suicidal Prayers

Lyrics

Alicia sometimes feels a little lost at sea She looks at her face and doesn't know what to see She knows she has a nice body but her face she covers in the selfie Got four million followers on Insta But none of them know the real girl And on her instagram all you see are a bunch of comments that are witty But if you looked into her soul you know she's screaming Screaming into the mirror and praying "HELP ME!" Don't no help come Her mom died a while ago so there's never no "well done" She curls into a circle when her dad yells "I NEVER SHOULDA COME!" "I NEVER SHOULDA HAD YOU!" Hell in her house and then she goes back to school Everybody mock her behind her back Not the prettiest so all the other tools Go around mocking her, tearing her down, throwing her to the ground She calls it the ground rule Never fight back Never might ask For help Because then the abuse gets worse and they'll take another crack At her If she don't show she broken they won't rest till she breaks And so the push her and trip her Abuse at home Abuse at school She puts up a smile But she know it's fake Walking home one day, forgot her can of mace Man came up from behind and then she got raped Couple weeks later she find out she pregnant And by the second trimester it's obvious Now they laugh at her face "You couldn't keep your legs together, you skank!" They shove her to the ground, she don't know what to say She want to somehow find a way To end the pain She knows her dad has rat poison in the house So she just lay there on the ground and she allows herself one more time to pray Michael's sadness is sometimes chronic His mom an alcoholic She just can't stop smoking, can't stop sipping the tonic Dad left the family a while ago He's gotten over the shock, his mom's still catatonic Pain is his language, he's now diachronic He's angry about everything, call it cyclonic He wants her to live, the smoke in her lungs is pneumonic He screams to God in the mirror, "HELP ME!" Don't no help come His mom wants to forget He wants her to remember He tries to get her To see him He tries to be her mnemonic He tries to hug her and she moves away, mumbling "stop it" Lately feeling that he's invisible Used to be that his mom and he were indivisible Music the only thing that brings him hope Goes to his favorite rapper's tour and gets let down in the show They talk about the fame and the money They talk about the lucid life and the winning Talk about how the fans push them and then push this boy away Woah Michael saves up all his money to go to the meet n' greet He can see the grills in the rapper's teeth Tells his hero about his problems Says "you give me hope, I don't care that you don't rhyme sometimes, you're only human" Looks for the words of wisdom that're about to drop from the man Then the rapper smiles and says "have a good day, good luck" And the boy is pushed along, gets shoved out, this wasn't the plan He's at a loss He doesn't know what to do He was just glossed Over He goes to school And is just mocked "Where's your mommy? Oh, that's right, she too busy with her liquor" He's a man Men don't whine So he locks himself in the bathroom stall And only then allows himself to cry He needs somehow to end the pain He knows he has knives at home He don't see no other way So he just bows his head into his hands and allows himself one more time to pray Bethany sometimes seems be from Disney Not the princess who is happy But the evil villain who has it all and then loses it Her family is rich And so she invokes a lot of jealousy Parents love their money More than they love Bethany And she tries to win their approval but their expressions stay frosty She turns into a bully If she can't find happiness then neither will anyone else Her life hurts so she make sure others feel like it's hell She has everything society says will bring her happiness But her soul is like an ATM She tries to fill it with money but she's still full of emptiness Because true happiness isn't something you can just cash in She tries to fill the void in her soul with parties But like an ulcer the ache just grows worse And ache that isn't physical and yet nonetheless hurts So she fills the hole in her stomach with beer And then she can't take how it sits so she hurls But she's empty again so she grabs another bottle Drinks once again with her girls But the beer makes her do stupid things, makes her mind twirl And then she gets filmed doing something that would make her mother's hair curl And make her ancestors roll in their graves She wants to find a way to end the pain She knows she has rope in the house This way her parents feel the blame She knows she's about to end it So she sobs into the mirror and allows herself one last time to pray