Online

Lyrics

[Verse 1] I work down at the Pizza Pit And I drive an old Hyundai I still live with my mom and dad I'm 5'3" and overweight I'm a sci-fi fanatic, mild asthmatic I've never been to second base But there's a whole 'nother me you need to see Go check out MySpace [Chorus] 'Cause online, I'm out in Hollywood I'm six-foot-five and I look damn good I drive a Maserati, I'm a black belt in Karate And I love a good glass of wine It turns girls on that I'm mysterious I tell 'em I don't want nothin' serious 'Cause even on a slow day, I can have a three-way Chat with two women at one time I'm so much cooler online So much cooler online [Verse 2] I get home, I kiss my mom And she fixes me a snack I head down to my basement bedroom And fire up my Mac In real life, the only time I've Ever even been to L.A Was when I got the chance with the marchin' band To play tuba in the Rose Parade [Chorus] But online, I live in Malibu I've posed for Calvin Klein, I've been in GQ I'm single and I'm rich And I got a set of six-pack abs that will blow your mind It turns girls on that I'm mysterious I tell 'em I don't want nothin' serious 'Cause even on a slow day, I can have a three-way Chat with two women at one time I'm so much cooler online Yeah, I'm cooler online [Bridge] When you got my kinda stats, it's hard to get a date Let alone a real girlfriend But I grow another foot and I lose a bunch of weight Every time I log in [Chorus] Online, I'm out in Hollywood I'm six-foot-five and I look damn good Even on a slow day, I can have a three-way Chat with two women at one time I'm so much cooler online Yeah, I'm cooler online I'm so much cooler online Yeah, I'm cooler online [Outro] (Yeah, he's cooler online) Hey, I'm cooler online (Oh, yeah, he's cooler online) Yeah, I'm singin' online Hey, I'm cooler online (Yeah) (Oh, yeah, woo)