My Van

Lyrics

Like clothes on the line I'm three sheets to the wind But stay tighter than the strings on a violin Me I'm as dirty as they come but still spic and span I ride twenty-eight inches on my creepy black van And you can catch me posted up down by the trailer park I'm sellin' bootleg movies from noon to dark But at nine o'clock it's time to close up shop And find some unsuspectin' girlie who gonna blow my top I like cruisin' by the gap and the old navy I like scopin' out the milf's and the old ladies Pullin' right up to the curb with my windows pitch black Practice catch and then release I do my thing and then I throw 'em back (My van) In my van they don't never see it comin' Stone cold killer slangin' rock hard lovin' (My van) In my van here's how we do I got somethin' waitin' for you (My van) In my van they don't never see it comin' Stone cold killer slangin' rock hard lovin' (My van) In my van here's how we do I got somethin' waitin' for you I never keep 'em very long because they tend to stink And they'll be fuckin' up my camel skin zebra print seats And I'm a motherfuckin' pimp so can't be crampin' my style With some decomposin' stank ho wearin' a smile I gotta keep my reputation I got clientel I can't be pushin' Findin' Nemo with no funky ass smell I keep my chevrolet polished and my shag rug vaccumed And a sticker on the back glass says "shit happens" And I'm cool as fan in my burt reynolds shades But my futures pretty dim that's why I can't get laid So I'm a get it how I get gotta get up in them britches I'm a get it how I get I'm a take it from these bitches! (My van) In my van they don't never see it comin' Stone cold killer slangin' rock hard lovin' (My van) In my van here's how we do I got somethin' waitin' for you (My van) In my van they don't never see it comin' Stone cold killer slangin' rock hard lovin' (My van) In my van here's how we do I got somethin' waitin' for you If the van be a rockin', then don't 'cha come a knockin'? You might see me do the nasty face covered in a stockin' Nothin' on but a tool belt and BVD's A chick tied to a shelf full of DVD's I got that old-school porn showin' in the headrest Try chokin' out this honey but she ain't dead yet I got her in the camel clutch, remote control stuck in her butt She be switchin' scene selections everytime she bust a nut You might say I'm kinda sick and you might call me a freak Because I pull up to the intersection's grippin' my meat But to all them freaky bitches, bitches, I be the man I bet they never forget the time they had in my van! (My van) In my van they don't never see it comin' Stone cold killer slangin' rock hard lovin' (My van) In my van here's how we do I got somethin' waitin' for you (My van) In my van they don't never see it comin' Stone cold killer slangin' rock hard lovin' (My van) In my van here's how we do I got somethin' waitin' for you For you (Aww yeah…) I bet they never forget the time they had in my van I got somethin' waitin' for you I bet they never forget the time they had in my van Stone cold killer slangin' rock hard lovin' I bet they never forget the time they had in my van In my van here's how we do In my van here's how we do In my van here's how we do I bet they never forget the time they had in my van Rock hard lovin' Stone cold killer slangin' rock hard lovin' Rock hard lovin' I bet they never forget the time they had in my van (Yeah!) I bet they never forget the time they had in my van Rock hard lovin' I bet they never forget the time they had in my van Rock hard lovin' I bet they never forget the time they had in my van Rock hard lovin' Rock hard lovin' I bet they never forget the time they had in my van