Chest ( Script)

Lyrics

Alright, here we go, Bluey. I'm going to teach you how to play chess. What's 'chest'? No, not 'chest'. CHESS. Yeah - chest. OK, fine. I'm going to teach you how to play chest. Ooh! It's like checkers! Yeah, but a lot harder than checkers. And, so, probably a bit old for Bluey, right? Oh, how old ARE you? Don't you know how old your own child is?! I think I do, but just tell me. I'm six. Are you still six? Wow. I'm almost seven. Well, I reckon that's old enough. Can I ask why you want to teach Bluey chess? 'Cause smart people play chess. Can I play? She's five. Well, you might not be old enough for chess, Bingo. But you can WATCH us play. Ohh! It's OK, Bingo, you can help ME. Oh, Bluey. Thanks, Bluey! Where's the dice? This episode of Bluey is called Chest. OK, I'll show you the pieces. Who are the little bald guys? They're called 'pawns'. Prawns? No, not prawns. PAWNS. Hello, little prawn. OK, so the pawns can move one square forward. Well, sometimes two squares, but only on their first turn. And they take diagonally, see? OK, don't worry about that. Now this guy is... Hang on, who's THIS? This is Charleville. And this is Bonny b*mb. OK, Charleville and Bonny b*mb aren't invited. Ohh! A horsey! I've got one too! OK, so he's the knight. No, he's a horsey! Yeah, but he's called the 'knight'. No, the knight sits ON the horsey. Well, yeah, that's true. Everyone knows THAT. I thought you said SMART PEOPLE played chess. Well, whatever you call him... Mine's called Gallahop. Mine's called Daughter of Gallahop. He moves by jumping. Oh, yes, horseys love jumping. Ooh. Who is castle head? That's the rook. I'm going to call him Castle Head. Fine. Castle Head moves straight, like this. Castles can't move! This game's confusing. Yeah, it is, Bingo. Maybe you just want to do some colouring. No! She's on my team. Oh, right, let's just start. There. Your go, Bluey. Ohh! I want my own chest team. Well, there's only two teams, Bingo, so maybe you just watch. Ohh! Don't worry, Bingo, look. There's two horseys, see? And two Castle Heads. And two pompom elves? Bishops. And lots of prawns. Pawns! So this can be your team, and this one's mine. Thanks, Bluey. Nice one, Bluey. Uh... Look, that's not... Let it go, Deep Blue. Hang on. There's only one crown lady. And one wedding-cake head. Ah! Now, that's the king and that's the queen. King and queen! Can I have the queen, Bluey? Um... Sure. Thanks! Uh... You can't just... Oh, that's fine. Are you sure you're happy with the king? Yeah, I'm OK. Don't worry, Bluey, the king's the most important piece on the board. Is that right? Yes. And how many squares can he move? Well, just one. Just one square?! That was a big square, wasn't it?! Oh, I better rest my royal feeties. They're a wittle tired. Hey! Meanwhile... ..the queen moves as far as she wants, in any direction. Hup-hup-hup. Which is handy, 'cause she has to do all the work. Hup-hup-hup-hup! Are you finished? Yes. Anyway... Hey, where's Bingo? Ohh, it's a lovely day for a picnic. Hey! I thought the queen could go anywhere. Bluey, have your turn. What do I do? Just move a prawn. PAWN! No, no, forward only. That's it. My turn. Hey! Oh, yep, your turn. I'm moving Gallahop. Clip-clop-clip-clop. Uh... No, he can't go that far, mate, and you can't move two pieces at once. But Baldicus wants to visit Mr Shineyhead. They're friends. Well, no, they're actually enemies. No, they're friends. Their little prawn children go to kindy together. OK, they're friends. Now watch. This is how you take a piece. Boop! See? Gallahop! It's OK. He just starts from back here. Oh, phew. No, he's dead. Gallahop's dead?! Of course he's not dead. Oh, uh...yeah, no, he's not dead. He's just out of the game. Ohh! I did say chess might be a bit old for you, Bingo. You are going to pay, young man. My turn! Right! Where can I move? Uh... Here or here. Bang! There! Yeah, OK, now, you see, it's important to keep your pieces protected. I can just take him like this. Daughter of Gallahop! Grr! Yeah, I can just take him. What about here? Yeah, I'll take him again. Stop it! I'm just showing you the rules! Get the queen out, Bluey! Oh, yeah! Time for another picnic. Hyah! Can she do that? Yep. But I have him protected. Doink! My queen! Oh, no! Really, Bandit? Oh! And it was the king who did the honours. Mum, how do you b*at Dad? It's easy, Bluey. Here we go. I can b*at him in four moves. Ooh! First I move this guy here. Great start. Doink! Then I move him and ask Dad, "Why do you want to teach the kids THIS game?" And he answers, "Because smart people play chess, "and I want MY kids to be smart." Next move I ask, "And WHY do you want your kids to be smart?" That's a bad move. And this is what he'll say - "Right now you kids are little prawns. "But one day you'll be queens, "and I won't always be there to protect you, "so you'll have to look after yourselves. "But I'm going to do whatever I can now to help you." Checkmate. 'Cause he's a good king. And you're a good queen. But a lousy chess player. And you turned out fine. Work on their heads later. For now, just hearts. Here, Bingo. Ooh, welcome! First things first. You're not dead, OK? You're at a pool party. Yay.