Song Meaning
The lyrics paint a picture of a clandestine affair, focusing on the thrill and secrecy of illicit encounters. The narrator describes skulking around and throwing "explicit" looks, highlighting the forbidden nature of their connection. There's a palpable sense of fun derived from being "illicit," suggesting a deliberate embrace of the taboo. The casual mention of meeting at the workplace and the need to avoid being seen together underscores the hidden aspect of their relationship.
The central tension arises from the narrator's dual existence and the inherent conflict of their affair. They acknowledge the existence of "Paul" and "Shirley," implying a married partner for the person they are involved with. The narrator seems to find a strange solace in this situation, stating, "I don't have to love you, you see," which suggests a detachment or perhaps a way to rationalize their involvement. The repeated phrase "Not alone" at the end offers a glimpse into the narrator's underlying need, finding companionship even in a morally ambiguous context.
The craft here is in the stark, almost transactional language used to describe deep emotional and physical entanglement. Phrases like "Viv says you're there like Kleenex / To be used" reveal a cynical view of the affair's purpose, while the narrator's own declaration, "My affair / Is my affair," asserts ownership and perhaps a defiant self-preservation. The lyrics also subtly point to the pressures of conventional life, with "Families bring such deep frustrations," suggesting this affair is an escape from domestic obligation.
What makes these lyrics hit hard is their unflinching portrayal of desire intertwined with moral compromise. The narrator isn't necessarily seeking deep love but rather an escape from loneliness and the "frustrations" of family life. The final, insistent repetition of "Not alone" transforms the illicit encounter from a simple affair into a desperate, albeit unconventional, source of connection and validation for the narrator.