Hoggin’

Lyrics
I don't even go with the good looking ones no more. Too much disease out there, ya know what I'm saying? When I look for a girl I look for something a little more unique, I go into a bar, the aisle pops. Man, she gets. Old enough to fucking David. Maybe three-four hundred and fifty pounds. Type of chick that looks like she doesn't even have any legs. Celluloid dripping off the ears. Three chins in the back of her head. ANd I"m standing there saying to myself, nobody eleven thought of fucking that. Nobody's even talked to it. I'm gonna make her mine. So I go over and I start charming her. Is ay shit like, hey how are you doing honey? And guess what. I got fudge. Hershey chocolate kisses. We're talking Haggin dass babe. So by now, she's drooling. What do I do, now I wheel her back to my apartment. I got to butter her hips just to get her through the fucking door. This chick used to come to me every three weeks. I just dropped thirty pounds, yeah from your belly to your ass honey. I mean anyone could bang a good looking chick, you ever bang a big fat pig, it's like taking a ride. There's nothing like hogging, you guys know that. AH man, number one you get behind them you have to strap yourself in, because they. And then you grab on to a set of tit, and you don't know where the tits begin the belt ends. It's like one big lop of shit ya know. And she starts swinging from side to side, the celluloid is flapping off the fucking walls, you're dodging for your life ya know. And you just jam it in, but you don't even give a shit where it goes, you're just jamming it in. You know you're that fat when you're doing 69 and you can't even hear the radio. I'll tell ya. I gotta a snorkel hanging out of this chick's ass, and with the positions today you got to bend em, fold em, strength em, you gotta be fucking Gumbi to make love. And women, they got contraception, they got everything. You can fuck me, and take a shave at the same time. I'm like honey you mind if I use a little I"m gonna moose today. Everything they got in there, you, coils, slinky, tar batteries, I don't know whether to fuck her or change the oil.
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Credits
- Writers
- Andrew Dice Clay