Get Me What I Need

Lyrics

[ARCHIE] There's the cool kids – There's the preps And there's the skate punks And the jocks – And then there's me There's the losers – There's the nerds And there's the stoners And the goths – And then there's me But then there's you! 'Cause you're the new kid in the school You're not defined by one specific breed And so you're free to flit from group to group From scene to scene 'Cause you're the conduit, the medium, the go-between Which means you're perfectly positioned to Get me what I need! [EVAN, spoken] Look, Archie, I'm the wrong guy for this [ARCHIE, spoken] One date, that's all I'm asking! [EVAN, spoken] Isn't there some nice girl on the "Special Needs" bus? [ARCHIE] They don't like me Even back before the crutches It was clear I don't fit here So it's hopeless I can't walk right up to Kendra and say "Hey" She'd run away But look at you! You're making friends and having parties And adapting with impressive speed! Just twenty minutes when we're sitting So our knees could touch – Yes, it's a tiny inconvenience but it means so much! 'Cause out of all of Indiana, you can get me what I need! [EVAN, spoken] It's impossible! [ARCHIE] And what I need is- [ARCHIE] Kendra! Beautiful Kendra! Wonderful Kendra! Make her appear! [ARCHIE & BOYS] If you want a girl The girl you want is [ARCHIE] Kendra! Very hot Kendra! Go tell Kendra I'm waiting here! [BOYS] Kendra! Kendra! Kendra! Kendra! AH AH AH AH AH! [GIRLS] Kendra! Kendra! [BOYS] Very hot, very hot! [ARCHIE] Here's the problem: Every minute, every second that I wait Might be too late So let's face it: If I ever had a chance, the time is now So who cares how? Just do your best And I won't bother you again And that's a promise, guaranteed! So you can help me out and we can both do very well Or I can turn around and make your life a living hell! It's up to you, you've got a choice, you've got incentive to succeed! Yes, I know it sounds insane Jerry Lewis can explain! You've got to help me, Evan Help me, Evan Help me, Evan Help me, Evan! Get me what I- Need! [EVAN, spoken] I'll try! [ARCHIE, spoken] I knew you would