Tech Interview

Lyrics

Hello Stephen, It's a pleasure to meet you, have a seat, my name is [?] and I'll be interviewing you today. Do you need some water? Do you need to go to the bathroom? well then, tell me a little about your background and what brings you here interviewing with us today First of all I would like to truly thank you for the opportunity to come in here and interview, it's your company and I know you must, get a lot of applicants, so your time is precious and I get this so I thank you Whoops I said that already, sorry I'm just nervous I am at a loss for words, this pressure is astounding My heart is beating pounding, feel like I'm slowly drowning And you're staring at mе blankly as I recount my existencе Fears and distant wishes, dreams and my ambitions Why I picked my major and received federal assistance I see you taking notes, and I'm sweating through my collared shirt People [?] outside I'm [?] room doing all the work My mouth just vommiting, whatever comes to mind Better wrap this question up or else the rest will fall behind [?] an easy one we both relate to That's the way the cookie crumbles just don't ever let em' break you Awesome, thank you for those answers, we think it's good for candidates to have long term goals and aspirations in their life, so I truly appreciate it, speaking of aspirations, what do you hope to be doing in the near to mid future, are there any skill you're in the process of developing? Are there technologies you're eager to work with? Simply put, where do you see yourself in 5 years? Well, hopefully I won't be lonely, I'd like to be in love with someone, someone else in love with me But I got issues, all these things that make me good at engineering make me bad at steering things like happiness my way [?] on a tangent, about how little understanding I possess about my future Because all I do is question if I chose the right profession, will I ever learn my lesson? Dig myself out of depression long enough to make a difference To smell the citrus, tea tree eucalyptus Need to exercise forgiveness on myself and get to business Be a better person, and God willing curve my vices Cauterize all of the splices where I didn't heal the nicest May the scars I carry wit me get me there In half a decade I suspect I'll probably look into the mirror and have regrets I didn't live anywhere close to my potential Fires closer to my death in a life deemed inconsequential Wow, these are some very thoughtful answers you've given me, I really appreciate that you've taken the time to think these questions out thoroughly, and give me such great insight on you as a candidate, I think I've probably taken up a disproportionate amount of your time asking these hard questions, so I'd like to maybe give you the chance to ask me anything that's on your mind, so Stephen, what questions do you have for me? What are we doing here? What is my purpose? Where can I get the experience I need to feel less worthless? Why is nepotism [?] Why is everything political? Why is engineer I've ever met so cynical? (×2)