A Day in Falsettoland

William Finn & Stephen Bogardus & Michael Rupert & Janet Metz & Heather MacRae & Faith Prince & Danny Gerard & Chip Zien - Pop, Soundtrack
A Day in Falsettoland
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Lyrics
[WHIZZER, spoken] A day in Falsettoland Dr. Mendel at work [CAROLINE, spoken] [MENDEL] You go out on the street And there's all these People asking for a handout You go home, you open your mail And it's full of People asking for a donation I don't get it Then, you turn on the TV And they want money for I don't understand Starving children in Ethiopia! I just want to be left alone! In the '60s, everyone had heart [MENDEL] In the '60s, we were all a part of the same team In the '60s, we had a new world to start Could this– Oh God, don't say it is– Could this be the new world we started? Here I sit, brokenhearted and... [CAROLINE, spoken] Do I wait for the promotion, or do I take this IBM job? [MENDEL, spoken] Yeah, well, Caroline hmm [MENDEL] I don't get it I've been left behind Half my patients: Yuppie pagans Modeled on the Ronald Reagans Now the world is too pathetic And I don't get it at all [CAROLINE, spoken] Oh, I'm in a deep quandary about my career What do you think I should do? [MENDEL, spoken] Time's up! [CAROLINE, spoken] Aww [CAROLINE exits.] [MENDEL] At least there's Trina at home Trina in bed Trina obsessing And sort of caressing My head with her feet I once thought it was sweet But I don't anymore Now I just snore 'Cause I'm so exhausted Listening as those yuppie farts complain Listening as their shallow hearts explain Their lives [CHARLOTTE, spoken] Trina works it out [TRINA] Marvin's back with Whizzer Just like how it was If I don't like Whizzer It's because my ex sure does Why should that affect me? Sometimes I'm a lout Mendel serenades, and Jason calms me Why should I be wilting When their precious love is not in doubt? Work it out! [JASON, spoken] The neighbors relax [CORDELIA] How was your day at the hospital? [CHARLOTTE] Unbelievable What is that smell? [CORDELIA] Nouvelle bar mitzvah cuisine I've been practicing Cuisine, bar mitzvah, nouvelle Well? [MENDEL, spoken] Hi, honey [TRINA] Hi, honey [MENDEL] How was your day? [TRINA] It was terrible Did you hear that Marvin's back with Whizzer? Marvin's back with Whizzer! [MENDEL] Drop it, sweetheart Give it up You know I love you Honey, sweetheart, what's the matter? I don't get it Why don't you let go? [TRINA] After the first mile, I'll be okay I cannot let go until we have this bar mitzvah [MENDEL] Isn't it enough I want you every night? [TRINA, laughing] Ha! [MENDEL] Every other night? [TRINA, laughing] Hahahahaha! [MENDEL] Every third night? Everything will be alright [TRINA] Everything will be alright [MENDEL & TRINA] Everything will be alright [CORDELIA] How was your day At the hospital? [CHARLOTTE] It was wonderful For the first time in months Nobody died [CHARLOTTE] There were just Heart attacks and gallstones Light bulbs up the ass Fake appendicitis which is gas Which I diagnosed People overdosed and I saved them I saved young people, old people One priest and one high school principal Saving lives, I feel invincible Yes I do Do you know how great my life is? Do you know how great my life is? Saving lives and loving you [CORDELIA] You save lives and I save chicken fat I can't fucking deal with that! [CHARLOTTE] [MENDEL & TRINA] Do you know how great my life is? [CORDELIA] Yes, I know how great your life is Everything will be alright [CHARLOTTE] Do you know how great my life is? [CORDELIA] Yes, I know how great your life is Everything will be alright [CHARLOTTE] Do you know how great my life is? [CORDELIA] Yes, I know how great your life is Everything will be alright [CHARLOTTE] Saving lives [CHARLOTTE & CORDELIA] And loving you [WHIZZER] It bounced twice [MARVIN] No, it didn't [WHIZZER] Once, then twice You know it did [MARVIN] That's not nice [WHIZZER] No, it isn't But you're a pain in the ass [MARVIN] You're a beast But, at least When you play me, you win [WHIZZER] You give up [MARVIN] I perspire [WHIZZER] Where's the heat? Where's the fire? Used to be you'd desire A fight! So fight! [MARVIN] So play! [WHIZZER] One-two-three-four! [MARVIN] One-two-three-four! [WHIZZER] One-two-three-four! [MARVIN] One-two-three-four! [WHIZZER] Lucky dink! [MARVIN] I'm finessing [WHIZZER] Something stinks in how you play [MARVIN] Don't you think it's a blessing I'm so pathetically bad? [WHIZZER] Just stay back Serve with force I'll attack And, of course I will win Just give in To bliss And kiss... [MARVIN] [WHIZZER] Let's go! Do you know? Down the alley All I want Is you High lob Anything Low drive You do Ooh! Is all right Ceiling shot! Yes, it's all right Into the court! Do you know? Four walls! All I want... Dink! ...Is you [WHIZZER] Hit your shoe [MARVIN] No, it didn't [WHIZZER] Yes it did The game is through [MARVIN] That's not nice [WHIZZER] No, it isn't [MARVIN] God, you're a pain in the ass [WHIZZER] Play it raw Don't play pretty Sex and games In New York City Have got to be played with flair And passion And passion and flair [MARVIN & WHIZZER] [CHARLOTTE & CORDELIA] Do you know Do you know how great my life is? all I want is you? Do you know how great my life is? Anything you [MENDEL & TRINA] Do is alright Everything will be alright! Yes it's alright Everything will be alright! [MARVIN & WHIZZER] [MENDEL, TRINA, CHARLOTTE, CORDELIA] Everything will Everything will Everything will Be alright! Everything will Everything will Everything will Be... Be Be [ALL] Alright! Alright! [JASON, speaking] Soup's on!
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Credits
- Writers
- William Finn