Yo sé que no es cristiano

Song Meaning

The narrator grapples with a profound internal conflict, acknowledging that their thoughts and desires are far from Christian ideals. They confess to wishing ill upon others, specifically calling them "swine," and admit their repentance isn't genuine. This self-awareness highlights a deep-seated struggle between expected morality and raw, unfiltered human emotion. The repeated phrase "Yo sé que no es cristiano" acts as a constant, almost ritualistic, self-reproach. This internal battle intensifies as the narrator describes the urge to self-mutilate and suppress "bastard desires," even going so far as to suggest a "hair shirt" for their conscience. It's a visceral depiction of trying to punish oneself for thoughts deemed sinful. The lyrics paint a picture of someone wrestling with impulses they find abhorrent, yet feel powerless to control. The feeling of being "very wary" or "scared" ("escamado") suggests a deep-seated anxiety about these inner demons. The final stanza pivots to an external observation that fuels the narrator's inner turmoil. Faced with widespread "epidemic" and "misfortune," they express disbelief and anger that certain people "never die." This isn't just a general complaint; it seems to be a specific manifestation of their previously stated desire for the death of "swine." The contrast between their own perceived sinfulness and the perceived injustice of others' survival sharpens the emotional edge, making their internal struggle feel even more desperate and isolating.