Dying To Live

Lyrics

[Chorus: Harbyn] I'm dying to live And that's just the way that it is But I know I can comebackfrom this [Verse 1: Marcus Smith] Yesterday, Isaid "Goodbye" for the last time Iwish I'd said more but I thought we had time But time ain't promised, like rings to baby mamas Now I'm sitting, thinking "How are you gone and I'm just fine?" I ain't coping well. I thought I saw you downtown I had the windows open, listening to loud sounds Riding 'round, bumping Flo Rida, "Right Round" Right now, it's all that I can do to not drown I still have tickets to that show we were about to see The fuck I look like, front row, if you ain't next to me? I think you textin me, but it's phantom buzzing It reminded me of singing karaoke with your cousin That was good times, many good vibes Billy Joel said, "Only good die". You was a good guy. I should cry So if you hear this, man, know that I'm trying Know I'm dying to live, while a part of me is dying [Chorus: Harbyn] I'm dying to live And that's just the way that it is But I know I can come back from this [Verse 2: Marcus Smith] I hope you got my last message You know your mom and dad are still stressing Your little brother is a mess. It's been a year It's like you wasn't even here So I'm trying to kill the memories with beer and marijuana I ain't been sober since I saw ya Last fall, right before they threw the dirt up on ya I wanna go and be a figure for your daughter Share all your wisdom and life lessons, dawg, I I had a moment last month at therapy Doctor said let it out like you was hearing me So I screamed, told you, "Tell me why you do this?" No answer I punched the fucking wall until my hands hurt Cancer or fucking Lupus is something stupid I could've handled I wasn't thinking, like, maybe that my man's hurt I'm sorry you couldn't tell me I never realized. Now it's nothing but tears in my eyes [Chorus: Harbyn] I'm dying to live And that's just the way that it is But I know I can come back from this [Verse 3: Tracee Shade] What up Dame, I see the family ain't been the same I'm in God's hands now, I'll keep a place in your name Imagine my surprise seeing J.C. at the gate Tears in my eyes, never thought I'd see this place Cause they used to say ain't no coming back from such a sin No matter what you goin through, take a breath and give in To the almighty, take his hand, let him in You a man with a plan but you mortal in the end But anyway, I got your other message It definitely hurts the soul to see my mother stressing You know Dad always been a master of deception Still joking even when you ask the tougher questions I wish I coulda told my lil' bro congratulations He pointed to the sky on stage at graduation Made my baby girl look up at me I wonder if she saw me cause she looked so happy But get this though You and I still vibe at the same time Bumpin' Flo-Rida, lose our mind at the same line Right Round still on my karaoke soundtrack They got everything here so I had to find that Competition pretty stiff here But I don't think they got nothin' on you Everyone's voice is crystal clear but that Marcus Smith flair? Nah kid that's coming with you Now if you can show my daughter how to sing like you Show her a little music thing or 2 I feel like that could be the thing to do to get some light shining back in your life I shoulda followed my advice I tried to catch you after therapy man I saw your hand looking red Then I saw the hole in the wall But I don't think that you was hearing me when you rushed home to get in bed I wanna give some closure for all Now hear me out, it's not your fault bro Black in this society is beautifully awful Like playing Madden for the first time on all-pro Coach the team while being the players also I did what I can to provide for my seed 100 hours a week so she ain't never in need Since her mom ain't wanna be around, it was on me A burned out dad was something I ain't want her to see But the arrogance got me, though I prayed a lot I tried to muscle my way through all the pain I got The suffering's gone, I know this message is long So ima hit you up again on your next song I love you kid. Peace [Chorus: Harbyn] I'm dying to live And that's just the way that it is But I know I can come back from this