Cont

Lyrics

[Intro, spoken] So, yeah, this is, um, this is a new song I've written. It's kind of a, sort of jaunty swing number and it's called, um, "Cont" [Verse 1] I don't like Jews ... Neither should you They're ethically and spiritually poor, that's a fact I don't like black people ... It's just not acceptable There should be some kind of law that is that [Verse 2] And I get the shits with Inuits ... ... They get on my tits, the little bastards And women ... Just make me so mad, does that make me bad? Am I bad, is that bad? [Verse 3] And the fuckin' Italians, I just cannot stand them ... They really inspire my rancour Cheating fucking Italian wankers And lesbians and the bi-curious Make me furious ... It's not their fault, I know, but still... grr! [Verse 4] And fuckin' Christians ... I just want to punch 'em in their faces ... And I'm not comfortable with Muslims on the tube ... And I can't stand publicly breast-feeding mothers ... [Verse 5] And I hate gays who talk camp-ly ... And the fuckin' Chinese make me angry ... [Bridge] I hate the rich... I hate the poor... I hate bitches... I hate whores... [Outro] I hate Africans... I hate Japanese... I hate the disabled... I hate Burmese... Yeah, I don't care about your colour or your creed I will judge you for no reason... [Interlude, spoken] Is that... is that... no, just stop. [Heckler: I love you!] Ohhh. Oh, fuck. Sorry, I... it's, ugh, that's the trouble with trying out new stuff. It's... half the lyr- I had half the lyrics covered up. I thought I was... I was only... I think we, I think we should probably do it again; I think if we leave it there, I might run the risk of being misconstrued. It's not even called "Cont", it's called "Context"! [Verse 1] I don't like Jews Who make and distribute kiddy porn Neither should you They're ethically and spiritually poor, that's a fact I don't like black people Who risk billions of other peoples money gambling on future derivatives It's just not acceptable There should be some kind of law that is that [Verse 2] And I get the shits with Inuits Who find out what job I do And regale me with a racist joke or two They get on my tits, the little bastards And women Who judge other women for not holding the same views as them vis-a-vis career and mothering Just make me so mad, does that make me bad? Am I bad, is that bad? [Verse 3] And the fuckin' Italians, I just cannot stand them When they take a dive in the penalty box, denying Australia its World Cup spot They really inspire my rancour Cheating fuckin' Italian wankers And lesbians and the bi-curious Make me furious When their pride parade blocked the traffic flow when my baby had asthma and had to go to the hospital It's not their fault, I know, but still... grr! [Verse 4] And fuckin' Christians Who lean on their horn when my wife is being cautious at an intersection I just want to punch them in their faces, although my anger is fleeting I understand their frustration, she's a little too hesitant And I'm not comfortable with Muslims on the tube Who look over my shoulder when I'm reading And I can't stand publicly breast-feeding mothers Who smoke cigarettes while they're feeding [Verse 5] And I hate gays who talk camp-ly During the final act of King Lear And the fuckin' Chinese make me angry When they make sham erection potions out of the horns of endangered rhinoceros [Bridge] I hate the rich who use their wealth as an excuse for bigotry I hate the poor who use their poverty as an excuse for bigotry I hate bitches who get rabies and try to bite babies I hate whores who won't accept Visa [Outro] I hate African racists I hate Japanese homophobes I hate those disabled rapists I hate Burmese cats Yeah, I don't care about your colour or your creed I will judge you for no reason But your deeds! [spoken] So, um...