Not Evil

Lyrics
[Intro: Elizabeth Banks & Will Arnett] Oh no, are we in a musical? Uh, hope not [Verse 1: Tiffany Haddish] Hello, friends, my name is Queen Watevra Wa'Nabi Don't worry, I'm totally not one of those evil queens You've read about in fairy tales or seen in the movies And there's no reason at all to be suspicious of me [Refrain: Tiffany Haddish, Elizabeth Banks, & Choir] Not evil, not evil, no, the least evil person I know Mmm-mm Not evil, not evil, no, the least evil person I know I won't lie, it's actually very suspicious that you're leading with this [Verse 2: Tiffany Haddish] I'm so not a villain, I have zero evil plans No ulterior motive, just want to help where I can I wanna shower you with gifts 'cause I'm selfless and sweet So there's no reason at all to be suspicious of Queen Watevra Wa'Nabi The least evil queen in history And if you do not believe me I totally won't imprison your family 'Cause that'd be evil and that's so not me [Refrain: Tiffany Haddish, Elizabeth Banks, & Choir] Not evil, not evil, no, the least evil person I know Really? Because I'm getting super evil vibes here Not evil, not evil, no, the least evil person I know [Verse 3: Tiffany Haddish & Charlie Day] Benny, do you like spaceships? 'Cause I think they are great How'd you know that? Loving spaceships is my one defining trait! Well now, my good friend, you can build the spaceship of your dreams On your very own planet with your own spaceship-building team [Interlude: Elizabeth Banks, Charlie Day, & Nick Offerman] Come on, do not fall for this Wyldstyle! Haven't you heard? There's no reason at all to be suspicious of her [Refrain: Elizabeth Banks, Nick Offerman, & Choir] Not evil, not evil, no, the least evil person I know Yeah, I know she keeps saying that but she's clearly an evil queen Not evil, not evil, no, the least evil person I know Yar, well, I'm not buyin' it [Verse 4: Tiffany Haddish, Elizabeth Banks, & Nick Offerman] MetalBeard, a pirate without a ship, that's so cruel It's like a spider without a web or a queen without a fool Even her metaphors are suspicious I've got a surprise for you A planet that's really a pirate ship, and the population: your crew Her story checks out, she's cool, not evil [Verse 5: Tiffany Haddish, Allison Brie, Will Arnett, & Elizabeth Banks] What about me? Unikitty, what's the most glitter you can imagine? A lot Times that by infinity Woohoo And, Batman Don't even try it, lady, I don't need anything Oh, I know, that's why I'm going to give you half of everything Uh, like everything everything? Everything everything She's rad. This chick gets me Here's some other adjectives people use to describe me: Unduplicitous, unmalicious, unconniving, unnasty You're clearly just adding 'un' to words that describe you Who? Me? [Chorus: Tiffany Haddish] I'm Queen Watevra Wa'Nabi I never trick people into trusting me By hiding my true personalities So I can use them to accomplish my evil deeds 'Cause that'd be evil and that's so not me [Bridge: Tiffany Haddish] I never cheat, I never bribe, I never scheme, I never lie And that wasn't a lie when I said just now that I never lie 'Cause I never lie and I never laugh when children cry And I never poison enemies of mine And I never cry when I'm alone at night 'Cause I'm not sad, I love my life I'm gettin' off track, let me get back to the point I was makin' [Chorus: Tiffany Haddish] I'm Queen Watevra Wa'Nabi The most least evil person you'll ever meet And if you make eye contact with me I totally won't have you executed immediately 'Cause that'd be evil (Evil), evil (Evil), evil, and that's so not me
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Credits
- Writers
- Jon Lajoie