Song of the Hangman (”Gallows Scene”)

Lyrics

[HANGMAN] When the bell of doom is clanging For the man awaiting hanging Let's face the fact with no misgiving: One man's death is another man's living! [GALLOWS BUILDERS] One man's death is another man's living Under the gallows tree With union pay We sing all day The while our hammers bang If the world doesn't like it The world can go hang Under the gallows tree! Oh, riddle dee diddle dee dee! Oh, under the gallows tree! [HANGMAN] There are those who have me baffled They refuse to choose the scaffold To die in bed than hang they'd ruther Six of one, half a dozen of t'other [GALLOWS BUILDERS] One man's death is another man's living Under the gallows tree We earn our fee Philosophically The while our hammers bang If the world doesn't like it The world can go hang! Under the gallows tree! Oh, riddle dee diddle dee dee! Oh, under the gallows tree! [TARTMAN] Sweets and tarts! Get your sweets and tarts! Fill your stomachs And warm the cockles of your hearts! Sweets and tarts! [SOUVENIR MAN, spoken] Hey tartman! What's the idea? There's nobody here yet! [TARTMAN, spoken] I was just warming up.  [SOUVENIR MAN, spoken] By Saint Veronica! Not a bad notion! (sung) Souvenirs! Hurry, hurry, hurry, get your souvenirs! Souvenirs of the hanging of Cellini— The greatest hanging of the season Get your likeness of Benvenuto Cellini— The occasion isn't complete without one! Souvenirs! Hurry, hurry, hurry, get your souvenirs! [MAFFIO] How goes it, hangman? [HANGMAN, spoken] Almost ready sir. Soon he'll bother you no more.  [MAFFIO, spoken] Are you sure it'll hold? [HANGMAN, spoken] I've never had a rope break on me yet, sir.  [MAFFIO, spoken] I want no slip-ups.  (sung) It was only by a stroke of Providence That I survived his murderous attack And now I want to see him dangling there And I won't feel safe on this earth until I do [HANGMAN, spoken] It's a great day for me too, sir.  (sung) The most famous neck in Florence (spoken) But 'tis pity that with that neck passes a great talent.  [MAFFIO, spoken] Bah! (sung) Of sympathy I haven't any! He's tried to kill one man too many! [TARTMAN] Sweets and tarts! Get your sweets and tarts! [SOUVENIR MAN] Souvenirs! Hurry, hurry, hurry, get your souvenirs! [TARTMAN] Fill your stomachs And warm the cockles of your hearts [SOUVENIR MAN] Souvenirs of the hanging of Cellini [TARTMAN] Sweets and tarts! Sweets and tarts! Sweets and tarts! [SOUVENIR MAN] Souvenirs! Souvenirs! [HANGMAN, spoken] What a day! [CROWD, spoken variously] What a turnout! What a turnout! What a hanging! What a hanging! What a city! [OFFICIALS, spoken] What a city! What a city! (sung) With nothing but pity The folk we dismiss Who live in a city That's other than this