The Stand Up Comic’s Instructions

Lyrics

Now listen: Get 'em laughing - keep 'em there You hold your own and they'll hold theirs Hold their glasses - can't hold their beer Tell 'em the one about the friggin' queer Do the one that always works 'Bout the lazy blacks that don't like work And once you got 'em, keep 'em there Raise their spirits! Raise their cheer! I don't know what you want from me But I know I'll never be The kind of person who gives away just laughs Do that one that never fails 'Bout the gang of white thugs and the Asian male And once you got 'em, they'll be with you! See this lot's loyal, through and through Tell Irish jokes and you can't miss Do the building site one and how they're all thick Keep 'em laughing - you'll have it made We're a friendly lot and you'll be well paid I don't know what you want from me But I know I'll never be... But keep 'em laughing don't let it stop Or the truth might catch up and spoil the plot