Secret Wars

Lyrics

[Intro: Samples] "This uplifting cinematic experience…" "Uh, I've got something important to tell you, man" "The big story is…" "Dig this and dig it deep" [Verse: The Last Emperor] What if I had the Power to gather all of my favorite emcees With the illest comic book characters And they became archenemies? Inconceivable? Unbelievable? Yet as wild as it seems The Emperor and Stan Lee would coach the two opposing teams Keep it clean, no bats, no gats, guns, or interference Comic book characters would go head up with raw lyrics Now I take whoever might be on break from doing tours And have 'em signed up for The Last Emperor's Secret Wars Sure, for that kind of capacity, you need a crazy large arena That might stretch from west Philadelphia to east Medina If I'm able, I'd put it on pay-per-view through my label And give free tickets to my neighborhood bums with no cable Yeah, that sounds phat. Now that we've squared away the propositions Let's begin with the ultimate tough-man competition ("Let the games begin!") ("Set it off!") Set it off, it's the fight of the century KRS and Professor X would battle each other mentally With rhymes. These two team captains waste no time Charles Xavier tried to invade Kris Parker's mind He shot a cerebral probe at Kris's mind but he missed it Professor X taken out by the Blastmaster's metaphysics Round two, new fight. Word to life, you gotta see this Locked in mortal combat is Dr. Strange and The Genius Yeah, son, he's no match, let that graphic wizard have it "My Liquid Sword slashes straight through Dr. Strange's magic" Another hero down, and now the score is two to zero By words from The Genius, and he's still my rhyming hero Now the next fight was conducted in a rough-like manner Specifically between Reggie Noble and Dr. David Banner Or should I say the Incredible Hulk when he's amped off the gamma? But Reggie Noble soon became the Incredible Redman and slammed him You know how Redman gets when his adrenaline starts pumping Started schitzing in the ring, so then The Thing tried to jump in Ben Grimm leaps into the ring, and after Redman he lunges "But Reggie Noble dropped him with two Brick City punches!" Rhymes by the bunches, bums get dirtier than Middle Eastern dungeons Ready to set this like Detective Columbo and his hunches While the ref's clean out the ring 'cause the last fight was so intense Let's do a live interview with the brother named Common Sense "Yeah, yeah, it's Common Sense, and Iceman tried to freeze me So I took him to Chicago and told him to take it easy He couldn't see me with my applejack hat and high-tops Colossus and Cyclops, I got No I.D. and Y-Not" Good looking, Common Sense. Yo, that last album was tight Let me get back to the ring and evaluate the next fight Now the next fight had to be the craziest of all times We got Dr. Octopus "versus the mighty Busta Rhymes!" Doc Oct versus Busta? Man, that stuff is dead He'll get his eight arms ripped off going up against the dreads "Ha, ha! Now Dr. Octopus, who you think you grabbing? The god can never lose, so you know it will never happen Lyrically making me sleepy, you'll need a nap when I slap you with my dreads—lights out, you'll kiss the canvas" Before my eyes, I see the demise of another superhero Next up is Ras Kass versus Magneto Now anything goes when Magneto battles foes But Ras Kass had him shivering, delivering ultra-magnetic blows Magneto was now deceased, and a wise man said it best "The sun rises in the east, but they can still set it the west" Now with all these heroes down, Stan Lee refuses to surrender He got Storm from the X-Men as if I couldn't match the gender Stan Lee shouts "Excelsior!" Yo, Stan, you best to chill "There's no match for Storm." I guess he's never heard of Lauryn Hill Now we all know Storm controls the temperature and weather Started running off at the lip, and L-Boog was like, "Whatever" See, she just got home from tour and she's a bit too tired to spar So she clocked Storm over the head with my man Wyclef's guitar All silence is ceased. Out of nowhere comes the Beast Versus Jeru the Damaja, the Black Prophet from the east Releasing rhymes that will pound you into the ground, there'll be no round two Another victory for hip-hop by the Dirty Rotten Scoundrel Now the underground sewer system that lies deep below the ring Is where the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and Das EFX do their thing Leonardo and Donatello, they well know we can do this "So kiggedty crazy Drayze hit them both with raw sewage" Now Raphael and Michelangelo, those two others who are brothers Books smacked 'em with the Das EFX logo, the manhole cover Whether you're plant or animal, vegetable or miggety-mineral Before you step to Das EFX, you best be hard like a criminal Taking you back to ringside, just when you thought it was over The last battle was brought forth by G.I. Joe and Cobra Mercenaries and soldiers, G.I. Joe was rolling thick But I'll get the military of hip-hop, a.k.a. the Boot Camp Clik World War III for '98. In the wake of all these troops I could see General Buckshot going toe-to-toe with Duke Salute the captain for rapping 'cause now we know who's hard Catching wreck like Steele and Tek up against the Crimson Guard Charging after you, smashing you, metaphorically bashing through The entire Joe team is O.G.C. and Ruck the Irrational Then, all of a sudden, I hear this real loud crack! "The Military Punisher Big Rock just broke Roadblock's back!" Adding insult to injury to Stan Lee and his team We've got Weapon X from Canada, a.k.a. Wolverine You know the routine: his claws can rip rappers for days "But here comes the Method Man, a.k.a. Johnny Blaze! Wolverine, you can't hang when Tical does his thang Paralyze you with the venom from the Method Man's fang!" This is the final battle as the stratosphere gets darker We got Nasir Jones versus Peter Parker Nasty Nas at "Halftime," head-ringer versus the web-slinger Illmatic versus radioactive in the Rotten Apple where the Dead linger. He cursed the day that spider ever bit him And gave him a copy of his second LP, It Was Written For all up-and-coming emcees, I've got a question: If I made a "Secret Wars Part 2," would your name even be mentioned? Would you make the final cut? I make the nicest give their titles up Writing rhymes/fighting crimes like the Blue Falcon and Dynomutt Stick around for the next battle-slash-adventure And if you see Stan Lee, tell him the Last Emperor sent ya