Lonesome Organist Rapes Page-Turner

Lyrics

[Verse 1] He told me that I knew just what to laugh at And I wanted to but I just couldn't ask if he would take it back So I could know for certain So on the bench, I watched his left hand crossing While doubling entendres with the voicings He said "Oh darling, you're charming, please don't find it alarming If I pull this stop out to free up a hand for heavy petting Now there, there, I'm a friendly man I joke about sex because it's funny when you're frightened" [Verse 2] So silently I sat and turned the pages Recalculating our respective ages Over my shoulder, he muttered, "If I get any older You can hack my wrists off with your choice of objects No, I'm kidding Don't be scared, I'm a friendly man I joke about death because it's funny when you're frightened" [Chorus 1] This is as far as I could get He jabbed a needle in my neck Erasing all the evidence But there were matchsticks in my pants And if a rock should hit my head And I remember what he did You'll be the very first to know Maybe I'll find out why this damn thing won't stop bleeding [Verse 3] He told me that I showed a great potential That given I turned heads and pages fame would be a piece of cake But practice was essential So like a stupid child, I believed it And golly, who would ever had agreed if I had been Schubert or Mozart Devoted to the fine art of perfecting absolutely everything inconsequential Don't be sad, I'll come back again I joke about trash 'cause it takes class to be enlightened [Chorus 2] So several decades have gone by I am still sitting by his side I turn the pages faithfully He turns his head and smiles at me And with a wink he says, "I doubt We would be anywhere without Your gift for keeping truth and consequence from meeting"