ESSEX LAND

Lyrics

[Intro] Welcome to Essexland There's lots of cash-in-hand And this is just one man's story So here it goes [Verse 1] Spending dole at the bookie shop Done the lot Now it's back to noodle pots Who's the boss of profit loss? Out the front, St George's cross On his land Contraband Fell off the back of a Luton van It's all backhand and brickie tans I don't expect you to understand If you're not from Essexland [Chorus] He's an Essex man in an Essex land He goes to work where he earns his grand And he makes it last all week Bills to pay and mouths to feed Life is just such fun in Essexland (We always slum it right) [Verse 2] Saving for a Turkey trip To bring my hairline back a bit Cheaper if I go away Get my teeth done in a day Lower than the asking price Cheap cologne and furry dice Do it all to fit in nice Some do it just to entice In Essexland Not me though [Chorus] He's an Essex man in an Essex land He goes to work where he earns his grand And he makes it last all week Bills to pay and mouths to feed Life is just such fun in Essexland (We always slum it right) Oh (In Essexland) He walks the tight rope (In Essexland) He never drives slow (In Essexland) They call him John Doe (In Essexland) He gets what he wants so cheap it's almost free In Essexland (We always slum it right) [Verse 3] Double Dutch Dip the clutch Goodbye thank you very much Can you tell Here from hell? I can, different personnel Beginner's luck Tummy tuck Corner shops, they've all been shut Au revoir, so long, and farewell Another thing that's been and gone In Essexland (Ha ha ha ha ha huh ho!) Spend the night at the bar Pub was full from my memoir Standing at the fruit machines Bloke behind me looking mean Fancy that, gonna leave Beer is soaking up my sleeve Seen some things you won't believe So it's back to where I'm out of sight But where? I'll tell you where In fuckin' Essexland [Chorus] He's an Essex man in an Essex land He goes to work where he earns his grand And he makes it last all week Bills to pay and mouths to feed Life is just such fun in Essexland (We always slum it right) Oh (In Essexland) He walks the tight rope (In Essexland) He never drives slow (In Essexland) They call him John Doe (In Essexland) He gets what he wants so cheap it's almost free In Essexland (We always slum it right) Well, goodbye for now Until next time