TV Guide

Lyrics

[Ras Kass] The world is a TV show, sometimes you need the TV Guide [Verse 1] As The World Turns, NBC Dateline (Flatline!) 3rd Planet From The Sun Millennium, Earth: Final Conflict Bold and the Beautiful, Young and the Restless Presides convicts Hotlines from perverts and psychics Live from Babylon 5 But Touched By An Angel Seeking 7th Heaven, Another World The Outer Limits in Deep Space 9 Massages by the Borg bitch, Seven Of Nine Intertwined but still stuck on Planet Groove Smart Guy in The PJ's living in Rap City, BET The ghеtto is Spin City DC Spit my A&E Biography, honestly Only the wiser bеcome Survivors The X-Files among these reptiles Strictly Pay-Per-View But most, they The Pretender Dying, never knowing the truth Dark suit, it's all pain No real niggas is allowed to ride the Soul Train Only if you're popular, mayne See, Everybody Love Raymond He Caucasian, he own the plantations: Fox, CBS, ABC CNN, TNT, ESPN, MTV Disney, AMC, to Bravo FX, Nickelodeon, Showtime, 'Max and HBO He Hate Me doe (Why?) 'Cause Malcolm & Eddie want to be Made Men and Sopranos How do I know? Big Brother video and Five-Oh Cops – NYPD Blue to LAPD: Life on the Beat Law & Order is beating down blacks in the street Mad About You, Just Shoot Me The Practice is guilty Mills Lane, The People's Court and Judge Judy killed me Rush the ER, General Hospital but nope No Medicare means (What?) – no Chicago Hope I Poltergeist, walking into a Guiding Light Got One Life To Live and I don't want to die tonight [Chorus] TV Guide, tell-a-lie-vision, TV lie That's the plan though, TV guide Watch television programs to program man Remote control to your soul, turn the channel [Verse 2] America's Funniest Home Videos, really don't Fuck with the Anti Defamation League, they cancelled Arsenio Sue me, I'm The Hughleys Love black cuties with fat booties Feelin' the burn, with silicone double Ds On the "dubba-dubba"-WB's (What?)— white bitches Ain't got no ass, plus they wrinkle too fast Spin the Wheel of Fortune, niggas always be in Jeopardy America's Most Wanted, Crook & Chase, not Donny & Marie Regis, no Kathie Lee I'd rather be Howard Stern Fuck Jenny Jones Makeover, Oprah Winfrey got the perm But Michael Williams only date white bitches So Robin Givens got to Forgive Or Forget Or get on Springer and fight bitches Plus niggas don't give a fuck And Murder, kick you off the Real World like Puck It's a Comic View, Jay Leno, Letterman replying Conan O'Brien, News At 10 steady lying Confused bitches on Love Line crying Dinner And A Movie – 'The Mack', chicken wings frying A E! True Hollywood Story With bad Spelling like Tori A Party Of Five is always worried I'm crabby, sister's gabby, Mom's aggie 'cause Daddy Thought Home Improvement was grabbing The Banny fanny (That's ill!) I just want to be King Of The Hill (Lovely!) Lovey-dovey with All My Children, watching Teletubbies [Chorus] TV Guide, tell-a-lie-vision, TV lie That's the plan though, TV guide Watch television programs to program man Remote control to your soul, turn the channel [Verse 3] Friends play Blind Date, trying to make a Love Connection Then the Newlywed Game, but mad niggas be depressed when They're Married With Children, Unhappily Ever After Having A Change Of Heart Find out Bill Clinton was waxing her (with cigars!) Guess I was Saved By The Bell At USA High blunted with aliens at Roswell Uh, Sex In the City is shit The Sisters got Duck Tales just gossippin' 'bout chicks Ally McBeal, she anorexic, have you seen her? Heard she date niggas, fucked the biology teacher Kids fiend to get in between her, behind the bleachers Misdemeanor, introduced my Young Hercules to her Xena vagina Moesha, she a junior, used to be a minor But rumor is Felicity got the ill nana Got even nearer to Tia & Tamera Sister, Sister share a twin bed with ceiling mirrors Hysteria, 'cause young blacks is Animaniacs In South Park sipping Remy, killing many a Kenny Give me an Emmy, 'cause we all act friendly Some Seinfeld players, some gayer than Frasier Closed-caption to the player hater, nigga Charmed by Alyssa Milano and Buffy the Vampire Slayer I Baywatch on Sunset Beach Beverly Hills 90210, Melrose Place to Dawson's Creek That's all in just one week, Must-See TV Still Telemundo if it's Spanish you speak Cost a dollar ninety-nine plus tax TV guidance plus science and actual facts Now picture that [Outro: Harry Allen] Why? The media is a source of titillation More than information The mission of the media is to induce comfort And primarily... to sell The media paints false pictures of the nation and the world Pictures designed to serve corporate masters To make America look good This feel-good media approach Serves the American delusion of white supremacy But it does not inform The major media, like its racist's projections, is to be rejected, not consumed For your very belief is enough [Ras Kass] Turn the channel