Song Meaning
The narrator descends from a mountain, shedding the trappings of a long, ascetic life dedicated to spiritual pursuits. This physical descent mirrors an internal realization: a profound lack of aptitude for the very "spiritual matters" they've devoted years to. The image of leaving "robes hanging on a peg" powerfully signifies a renunciation, not of faith, but of a specific, disciplined path that proved unfruitful. It’s a quiet, almost anticlimactic admission of personal failure in a chosen field.
The transition from the solitary mountain to the "stream of cars" on the Santa Monica freeway marks a jarring shift in reality. The narrator enters a world of mundane movement and anonymity, a stark contrast to their previous existence. The overheard "Thank you beloved" feels like a moment of unexpected, perhaps ironic, grace or acknowledgment from an unseen source, even as the narrator is submerged in the everyday.
The lyrics hint at a growing tension with fellow practitioners, who are now posing "angry questions" about "ultimate reality." This suggests the narrator’s perceived lack of spiritual progress or perhaps a divergence in understanding has created friction. The final line, "I suppose it's because they don't like to see / Old Jikan smoking," offers a wry, almost defiant explanation. It implies that their perceived transgression – perhaps a simple act of personal indulgence or a sign of disillusionment – is more upsetting to others than any profound spiritual insight they might have failed to achieve.
This narrative’s effectiveness lies in its understated portrayal of disillusionment. The narrator isn't dramatic or regretful; they simply state their realization and move on. The juxtaposition of intense spiritual discipline with the mundane reality of freeway traffic, coupled with the subtle social friction, creates a poignant picture of finding one's limits and facing the world after a long period of intense, ultimately unfulfilled, dedication.
