Song Meaning
The narrator describes a solitary, intense period of self-improvement, acknowledging the painful process and the irreversible nature of their chosen path. They are working through personal struggles, seeing "blood and sweat" through their own tears, and understand there's no turning back from this deep dive into self-discovery. This commitment is framed as an unavoidable destiny: "otherwise it couldn't be."
Despite the internal focus, the lyrics acknowledge external judgment, with the narrator anticipating criticism calling them weak for falling into this "ravine." However, they dismiss this judgment, asserting their unique artistic "handwriting" developed through this struggle, intending to use it to definitively conclude their personal narrative. This suggests a defiant stance against doubters, fueled by the arduous process of self-creation.
The core tension lies between the immense personal cost of this self-refinement and a desire for external validation, specifically from a significant "lady." The narrator has endured countless trials, losing track of even their own reflection, all with the hope of becoming an example. Yet, the ultimate goal seems to be winning the approval and healing touch of this one person, who has left them as the "hero of a solo novel."
The most striking aspect is the juxtaposition of profound exhaustion and unwavering resolve. The narrator admits to being "tired" and "very worried," yearning for rest, but simultaneously declares they will "bring the matter to an end." This internal conflict highlights the immense pressure and the sheer willpower required to see such a demanding personal quest through to its conclusion, reinforcing the initial statement that "otherwise it couldn't be."