Dan is the Man

Lyrics

"Captain! There's a traitor on board!" "Examine the horn!" According to the education You get when you small You will grow up with true ambition And respect from one and all But in my days in school They teach me like a fool The things they teach me I should be a block-headed mule And what they teach you? They tell me pussy has finished his work long ago And now he resting and thing Solomon Gundy was born on a Monday The ass in the lion skin Winkin, Blinkin and Nod Sail off in a wooden sloop The 'gouti lose he tail and the alligator fighting To make monkey-liver soup And Dan is the man in the van Wepsee mama! The poems and the lessons they write And send from England Impress me, they were trying to Cultivate comedians! Comic books made more sense You know it is fictitious Without pretense Cutteridge wanted to keep us in ignorance! Tell me if this ain't stupidness: Humpy-Dumpty sat on a wall Humpy-Dumpy did fall Goosey, Goosey Gander? Where shall I wander? Ding, dong, dell Pussy in de well! Ah R-I-K-K-I-T-I-K-K-I-Ah-T-Ah-V Ah Rikki Tikki Tikki Tikki Tavi! Dan is the man in the van Wepsee mama! Yep! I say, Cutteridge was plenty times more advanced Than them scientist I ain't believe that no one man could write So much stupidness Aeroplanes didn't come so soon Scientists used to make the grade in balloon Cutteridge make a cow Jump over the moon And then he tell then: Tom, Tom the piper's son Thief a pig and away he run Once there was a woman who lived in a shoe She had so many children she didn't know what to do Dickory a-dickory dock The mouse ran up the clock The lion and the mouse A woman pushing a cow To eat grass on top of a house And Dan is the man in the van Wepsee mama! How I happen to get some education? My friends, me ain't know All they teach me is about Brer Rabbit And Rumpelstilskin-o They wanted to keep me down indeed They try they best, but didn't succeed You see, me head was duncee And up to now I can't read! Who cares about: Peter, Peter was a pumpkin eater? Some little, little people tie Gulliver? When I was sick and lay a-bed I had two pillow at my head The goose lay the golden egg? The spider catch a fly? Morocoy with wings flapping in the sky? They beat me like a dog to learn that in school If me head was bright I woulda be a damn fool! With Dan is the man in the van Can a pig dance a jig for a fig? Twirly and Twisty were two screws Mister Mike goes to school, on a bike With Dan is the man in the van With Dan is the man in the van Yeah! With Dan is the man in the van!