The Homeless Lady’s Revenge

Lyrics

[THE HOMELESS LADY] Books for sale! Two bucks a book! We have books All sorts of fiction You can buy at a discount As of this count 103 books From classics to mystery Also gay history here On the street! Where do I get them? I have my sources Readers, divorces, lives go bad Kids go to college Mothers throw their books away And mothers throw their books away When mothers get mad We have books [GORDON & ROGER] Life is wonderful [THE HOMELESS LADY] Fancy books [GORDON & ROGER] Very wonderful [THE HOMELESS LADY] All these books displayed in my trolley Poems, porno and whackery Also some Thackeray here On thе street [GORDON] I can't believe what I see Half thеse books belong to me Half these books With my name on the cover! [ROGER] Some with the name of your lover [GORDON] But you have found my books You have found my history Oh, you don't know what this means to me! It means to me I live I live! [ROGER] Lady Grace Do you recognize my face? [THE HOMELESS LADY] Two bucks [ROGER] In an uninviting place [THE HOMELESS LADY] Two bucks! [ROGER] I am someone who you've counselled once before [THE HOMELESS LADY] Don't touch them [ROGER] Blink or somehow try to show I am someone who you know Please forgive me if I stand here to implore But here's his whole library Which I think is very, very well-worth fighting for [THE HOMELESS LADY] I don't care if you're the King of England I don't care if you're a saint It's two bucks! [GORDON] What? [THE HOMELESS LADY] I don't care if life's a silly picnic Which is something that it ain't It's two bucks, Two bucks! If you were my mother Uno, dos! Two bucks If you were my dog [ROGER] Where did you find them? [GORDON] She's making me crazy [THE HOMELESS LADY] I have my sources [GORDON] You're making me crazy! [THE HOMELESS LADY] Readers, divorces [ROGER] Oh, Jesus Christ! [THE HOMELESS LADY] Lives go bad [GORDON] But these are mine! [THE HOMELESS LADY] Not anymore, they aren't! Mothers throw these books away [GORDON] But these are mine! [THE HOMELESS LADY] And mothers throw these books away When mothers get mad Come buy them! [GORDON] Hey! Come back, come back! Those are my books! [ROGER] Gordo, what are you doing? They're only books