Laura, I Need Medicine

Lyrics

Got a crush on a girl Named Donna Pinciotti And I wanna take her home And play a badass game of Yahtzee Her real name is Laura And I just want another chance To not make so much noise Next time I'm goin' through her trash I'd make her a bowl of soup Just to hear the girl say thanks I'd bet fifteen million dollars That she shags like a Minx But I'm just a normal guy So I'll never get the chance To undo her polyester blouse And get into those seventies pants Oh, Laura I need medicine Laura be my Vicodin Laura you're my Demerol I wanna wash you down with alcohol Laura bе my Nembutal Laura you're my Tuinal Laura is my bag of reds Oh, Laura is my favoritе redhead I'm not obsessed But I just got a tattoo Of your name across my bicep And if you don't have minty breath I would get you a pack of Trident We could dress up like Kiss I wouldn't mind doin' your make-up Or we could talk about Eric And all the things that caused your break-up And I even loved you In that stupid GAP commercial And if for a second You might allow me to get personal I kept a used tube of lipstick You once threw away And now I'm gonna clone ya' Using your lips' DNA Oh, Laura I need medicine Laura be my Vicodin Laura you're my Demerol I wanna wash you down with alcohol Laura be my Nembutal Laura you're my Tuinal Laura is my bag of reds Oh, Laura is my favorite redhead I used to have another celebrity crush She went by the name of Drew Berrymore You might have heard of her before She was in a lot of bad nineties movies But one day that crush faded I fell asleep in San Diego And I awoke After having a horrible, horrible dream About her Shaving off my pubic hairs While humming the Tune to some obscure Smashing Pumpkins b-side Named "Slunk" Oh, it freaked me out But I got over it really quick And I was down in the dumps for months, though What brought me back? Laura Prepon Now the skies are sunny And we all have more traditional family values My life would be nothing without you, Laura Laura... I need medicine And a question crossed my mind While I watched your rerun tapes I just gotta know Does the carpet match the drapes? Laura I need medicine Laura be my Vicodin Laura you're my Demerol I wanna wash you down with alcohol Laura be my Nembutal Laura you're my Tuinal Laura is my bag of reds Oh, Laura let me give you head