Calling You

Lyrics

[Intro: KB] (Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah) (Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah) (Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah) (Let, yeah, yeah) [Verse 1: KB] It must have been 3 A.M. when the text came in The sum of my fears My stomach bendin', my thumb was tremblin', no pun intended But I wanted to die when I saw it was him And it read, "KB, this time it's real, homie I can't live" It was in all caps But I knew he had no caps on his guns or his pills So I ripped out the door All the covers down on the floor No shoes, I just walk on my tears Callin' him over and over and over again While I'm throwin' the car in to gear How could he be so selfish? Will this effort fail too? Why won't he answer, answer, answer, he answered! "Jason, hello?" [Chorus: Natalie Lauren] It's suicide, suicide, suicide Got one in the chamber that's waitin' to take you right out tonight Don't roll the dice, roll the dice, roll the dice It's all on the table, it's all for the takin' But what's the odds? [Verse 2: KB] Yeah I parked in the street At the car with the keys, should I call the police? What if he turns it on me? Then I looked up, is that him over the sink? I can't think My tongue is as heavy as my heart, I can't speak Every time I blink I'm a step closer, my heart about to burst As I close up on the front door and give the doorbell a ring, uh It was unlocked so I ran to the top staircase As I stare at a case on the floor "Jason, open up" Continued to knock, "Jason, open up You ain't gotta do this, what about the kids? Don't go Judas, you got reason to live We could get through this, don't give in" Then I heard movement and a voice I'll never forget He said, "Stop it, stop it! I'm about to cock it! You barely called back when I was in Iraq Just leave homeboy, I got this You know the truth is, I had to shoot kids I'm so guilty" ("Open the door!") "And God might let it go" ("Open the door!") "But I'll never forgive me" ("Don't do it") "Oh, why not?" ("I care, I care about you") "The Army never trained me to care You don't know the horror of livin' in a war zone And then comin' back to civilian affairs I made my bed, the table's been set My wife moved out, I don't see my kids Everything that gave me meaning is gone The grief's deep-seeded and bleeds to the bone I want out!" [Chorus: Natalie Lauren & KB] Suicide, suicide, suicide Got one in the chamber that's waitin' to take you right out tonight (Right out tonight) Don't roll the dice, roll the dice, roll the dice It's all on the table, it's all for the takin' But what's the odds? [Verse 3: KB] No, no, I ain't have a word, not a story not a verse But the silence, I'm tryin' not to make this worse I pray and I Googled a search Nothin' from school that will work, but I grew up in the church So what do I do? (What do I do?) Just fell to my knees and I started to blurt "I don't understand this, I don't understand this But you been lookin' to the weed and them dancers Don't be conned by the Ye Nobody in the West got the answers Let's get established, your life isn't yours to demand it You can't do what you please Jason, I love you, but the next step is God, homie You ain't escapin' a thing You know, Jesus, He wanted to die in that garden Acquainted to man in his sorrows But He kept up the fight 'Cause He knew joy, it was comin' tomorrow You haven't squeezed that revolver 'Cause you know that there's hope at the end of the tunnel Embrace it, don't matter how faintly God is not silent, please hear what He's—*gunshot* [Outro: KB & 911 Operator] *Knocking* "Jason!" *Phone dialing* "911, what's your emergency?" "Yes, uh I-I gotta friend, uh, he's, he's locked himself in the bathroom and I just heard a gun go off and, and I don't know" (*sirens*) "Okay, calm down, sir, are you able to get inside the room?" "Yeah, he, he's got me locked out" (I see you) "Okay, can you try to get inside the room?" (I hear you) "Hold on, I'ma try to—" *kicks door* "Sir?" (Hope is calling you) "Okay—Jason! Okay, he-he's not shot, he dropped the gun but he's passed out" (I see you, I hear you) "Sir, I'm gonna need you to calm down" "Send help—no, you calm down! Send help quick!" (Hope is calling you) Oh-oh, oh Oh-oh, oh Hope is calling you Oh-oh, oh Oh-oh, oh Hope is calling you