Lyrics

One two it's something new Three four you ain't heard it before I am the one man band in your speaker cone You're the girl who's home alone JVC's gonna take you to another zone I'm gonna fuck you with my microphone My hands are on the move, soon I'm feeling your chest As I use my eyes to check out the rest Of your body, I like your smile the best Your teeth are white like rice so you must use Crest I'm gonna strip you like a coat of paint The Lord knows I ain't no saint And when it comes to making love I show no restraint I'll get busy on your beaver til you start to faint Your clothes are on the floor, now you're in the nude And that's what it takes to get me in the mood I'm like the fork and you're the food So get a grip girl cuz you're gonna get screwed I'm a stoner with a boner I'm a stoner with a boner I'm a stoner with a boner I'm a stoner with a boner I'm always thinking bout getting laid Like my very first time in the seventh grade My friends and I were on a panty raid And back then the girls loved me so I had it made I picked one with long blonde hair And little red hearts on her underwear It was her time of the month but I didn't care My desire for her was too much to bear I got hard when she gave me head That girl knew what she was doing in bed Her eyes were blue and her lips were red And she was sucking away until I finally said I'm as hard as I'm ever gonna get So let's get it on now while your cunt is still wet From now on I'm forever in your debt For giving me the best night of my life as yet I'm a stoner with a boner I'm a stoner with a boner I'm a stoner with a boner I'm a stoner with a boner I'm stoned.... I'm a stoner with a boner And we all know that I'm the world's biggest loner I'm a stoner with a boner That's me