Lyrics

[Verse 1] Well love is like a drug that we often take To ease our pain, to ease our sorrow, and ease our misery Which ironically is usually caused by love And I had a dream where I met Beethoven And Beethoven told me that I wasn't very good He said, "all your songs are simple, like two or three chords And you never wrote a symphony, and your music makes me bored" Oh I- I got burned by Beethoven And Beethoven asked me, "how come in modern music There arе so many metaphors about like being likе the road?" And I was like, "I don't know I guess cause life moves pretty fast And you can't slow down and you can't turn back And every musician at some point has to scream out 'Life is a highway!'" [Verse 2] And he said, "life moves pretty fast, even in my day But we didn't have cars, and we didn't have highways And we didn't have autopilot: this thing that you invented Oh man, what were you thinking? Giving up your control of direction?" I said, "I guess we got lazy" He said, "I know you got lazy Your songs are three chords" And I was like, "come on! Give me a break!" [Chorus] He said, "you could give the wheel to God You could give the wheel to Satan You could fall down on your knees You could beg to be forgiven You could give the wheel to love You could give the wheel to hate Or you could just not give the wheel away." [Verse 4] I told him, "When I was a child, the classroom was my stage I knew if I could make the nuns laugh, then I could do anything … But it's hard to make the nuns laugh I don't know if you've tried I don't know how many nuns You hung out with in your life But trust me, it's hard to make them laugh [Verse 5] Ah yeah, but every now and then The Bible would say something silly And if you've read The Bible You know it happens all the time And I would form my joke Trying hard not to offend Oh, like the court jester With an axe over his head Yes, and every now and then Oh I, oh I, I could make the nuns laugh [Chorus] Yeah and you could give the wheel to God You could give the wheel to Satan You could fall down on your knees You could beg to be forgiven You could give the wheel to love You could give the wheel to hate Or you could just not give the wheel away." [Verse 6] Beethoven told me I was about to wake up And Beethoven apologized for saying that I sucked He said, "man, who am I to talk. I've been dead for so long.. I mean do people still remember me? Do they still play my songs? And I was like, "yeah. You're fine dude, just chill" [Verse 7] He asked, "am I a ringtone?" I said, "sometimes you're a ringtone.. But we also put you on a gold record And shot you into space" And he said, "man, how 'bout that? I mean, without a doubt To be a ringtone That's what it's all about" And I was like, "No! Not enough!" [Verse 8] He said, "John let's write a song together before you wake up.. It could even be simple, I just want it to be about love: Sweet and sarcastic, and a little bit negative" And I said, "Oh Beethoven, now you're speaking my language" He said, "can I write the first line?" And I said, "probably" He said, "will you finish it in the morning?" And I said, "probably" He said, "can we call it 'Fuck Auto Pilot'" And I said, "probably" He said, "Is it gonna be three chords?" And I said, "for you Ludwig, oh baby, I'll make it four!" [Verse 9] Yeah and he said, "wake up! Wake up! Wake up! There is life behind your eyelids and so much steering to be done" [Spoken] My name is John Craigie, I'm from Portland Oregon And kicking the fall tour off. I love this room. I love you guys You're an amazing crowd and I'll do my best...