Song Meaning
The lyrics paint a stark picture of lingering trauma, long after the immediate conflict has ended. The opening lines immediately establish a sense of profound psychological damage, with a "dog-eared mind" treating the heart like obsolete currency, "German marks," suggesting a past that is both foreign and deeply ingrained. This isn't just about remembering; it's about a mind that's been worn down and rendered useless by conflict, still processing its effects long after the "war was through."
The narrator is subjected to a brutal, almost animalistic treatment, "Stood me on a rusted rail / Turned my face and kicked my tail." This violent imagery, aimed "up toward the yonder blue," suggests a forced confrontation with a seemingly indifferent sky, a desperate, almost futile attempt to find solace or escape. The subsequent image of a fish "dance[ing] from the air he drank" is a powerful metaphor for a desperate, unnatural struggle for survival, mirroring the narrator's own post-war existence where "hunger knew" a primal need to simply exist.
The core tension lies in the narrator's attempt to reconcile the present with a past that refuses to fade. The recurring phrase "Like I was walking back to you" acts as a phantom limb, a persistent echo of connection or perhaps a desired return to a state before the war. This desire is contrasted with the chaotic imagery of the war itself – "caravans and mocking birds / And painted girls with twisted words" – a disorienting spectacle that dismantled normalcy, as the "leaning fence" lost its border. The narrator's current state, watching the "failing moon" and "shower-stars," is one of weary anticipation for a future where "The whole thing will look new."
Ultimately, the lyrics express a profound yearning for oblivion as the only path to healing. The narrator anticipates a "blessed" forgetting, a release from the "ways of God and all regret." This isn't a triumphant overcoming of trauma, but a desperate hope for erasure, a wish to be so fundamentally changed by time and new experiences that the past, and the pain it holds, simply ceases to exist, allowing for a return to a state of being, perhaps symbolized by that elusive "walking back to you."