My Dead Gay Son

Lyrics

[RAM'S DAD, spoken] You wait just a minute, Paul! It is ignorant, hateful talk like yours that makes this world a place our boys could not live in! They were not dirty! They were not wrong! [RAM'S DAD, sung] They were two lonely verses In the Lord's great song! [KURT'S DAD, spoken] Our boys were pansies, Bill! [RAM'S DAD, sung] Yes! My boy's a homosexual And that don't scare me none— I want the world to know... I love my dead gay son! [RAM'S DAD, spoken] I've been thinking. Praying. Reading some magazines. And it's time we opened our eyes! [RAM'S DAD,(sung)] Well, the good Lord made gay penguins And gay bonobo chimpanzees I've seen gay lions show their pride in documentaries If nature gets her orders Handed down from god above Then animal or human You can't help the one you love They were not dirty— They were not fruits! They were just two strong laces in the Lord's big boots Well, I never cared for homos much until I reared me one [RAM'S DAD & CONGREGATION] But now I've learned to love… [RAM'S DAD] I love my dead gay son! [CONGREGATION] He loves his son He loves his son His dead gay son! [RAM'S DAD] Now, I say my boy's in heaven! And he's tanning by the pool The cherubim walk him and him, and Jesus says it's cool! They don't have crime or hatred, there's no bigotry or cursin' - Just friendly fellows dressed up like their fav'rite Village Person! They were not dirty— [CONGREGATION] Whoa! [RAM'S DAD] They just had flair! [CONGREGATION] Whoa! [RAM'S DAD] They were two bright red ribbons in the Lord's long hair Well, I used to see a homo and go reachin' for my gun [RAM'S DAD & CONGREGATION] But now I've learned to love… [RAM'S DAD] And furthermore! These boys walked hand in hand! These boys, they took a stand! They could not wait One second longer to be free! They cast off their disguise No shame, no compromise! Paul, I can't believe that you Still refuse to get a clue After all that we been through— (spoken) I'm talkin' you and me! (CONGREGATION gasp) In the summer of '83! (CONGREGATION gasp again) [KURT'S DAD, spoken] That was one hell of a fishing trip [CONGREGATION] Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa Whoa, whoa, whoa! They were not dirty— Whoa! And not perverse— No, no! They were just two shiny rhinestones On the Lord's big purse! [BOTH DADS] Our job is now continuing the work that they begun! [CONGREGATION] 'Cause now we love, love, love! We love your dead— [RAM'S DAD] They're up there disco dancing to the thump of angel wings! They grab a mate And roller skate While Judy Garland sings! They live a joyful afterlife that's fancy-free and reckless! They swing upon the pearly gates— And wear a pearly necklace! [CONGREGATION] Whoo! [BOTH DADS] They were not dirty! [CONGREGATION] No! [BOTH DADS (CONGREGATION)] They were good men! (Whoa!) And now they're happy bear cubs in the Lord's big den! [BOTH DADS] Go forth and love each other now Like our boys would have done [ALL] We'll teach the world to love... [BOTH DADS overlapping with congregation] I love my dead gay son! My son! My son! [CONGREGATION] Not half bad, your dead gay son! Wish I had your dead gay son! Thank you, dad, for your... [BOTH DADS & CONGREGATION] Dead! Gay! Son!