I Don’t Know His Name

Lyrics

[ILONA, spoken] You belong to a Lonely Hearts Club? [AMALIA, spoken] I've never done that sort of thing before I'd seen the advertisements in the papers [ILONA, spoken] Well, who hasn't? 'Young man wants young lady Young lady wants young man.' [AMALIA, spoken] But I've never taken them seriously Until one day, I saw his advertisement Even then, I tried not to answer it, really But it just kept calling out to me [ILONA, spoken] He could be seventy five! [AMALIA, spoken] No, the advertisement says 'young man.' [ILONA, spoken] You haven't even asked for a photograph?! [AMALIA] I don't know his name or what he looks like But I have a much more certain guide I can tell exactly what he looks like Inside When I undertook this correspondence Little did I know I'd grow so fond Little did I know our views would so cor- Respond He writes me what his feelings are On Shaw, Flaubert, Chopin, Renoir The more I read, the more I find We're one in mind and heart I know the kind of home we'd share The books, the prints, the music there A home, a life, that's warm and full And rich in love And art I don't need to see his handsome profile I don't need to see his manly frame All I need to know is in each letter Each long revealing letter I couldn't know him better If I knew his name (spoken) Oh, I know him so well, Ilona I know that he's a very successful person And terribly well-educated And he's gentle and kind and soft-spoken Oh, I know all this about him, and so much more! I've just never met him, that's all [ILONA] If he isn't too handsome True it doesn't much matter But his personal habits Are more important than his looks Supposing he snores Like a locomotive? Supposing he grinds his teeth? Supposing he's a Knuckle cracker, Amalia? Good luck with your books! And another small detail That you haven't yet mentioned I am speaking of sex, dear When you and he are all alone Come to think of it Maybe you're right Maybe it doesn't matter at that Maybe I'd do much better myself With a library card And a gramophone. [AMALIA] He writes his deep- Est thoughts to me On Swift, Vermeer And Debussy De Mau- Passant Dumas, Ducas Dufy Dufay, Defoe He thinks as I He feels as I He shares the same Ideals as I I'll never find A man who's so So Simpatico I know [AMALIA] I don't need to see his handsome profile [ILONA] I was taken in by someone's profile [AMALIA] I don't need to see his manly frame [ILONA] I was taken in by someone's frame [AMALIA] All I need to know is in each letter, each [ILONA] How I could have used one [ILONA & AMALIA] Long revealing letter [AMALIA] I couldn't know him better [ILONA] I hope you do much better [AMALIA] If I knew his name [ILONA] I knew his name [ILONA & AMALIA] What's in a name?