The Dance That Broke My Jaw

Lyrics

[Intro] Hut! Hut! Hut! Hut! [Verse 1] Hey man, I saw you standing there Yeah, Yeah, Yeah You were bobbing your head to the beat as your fists start to clinch Oh so tight "No Fear" in your eyes, and also on your shirt (and hat and pants) It's your turn to show tonight, do your best to start a fight Show us all that you can dance with your elbows and your hands (Dancing with friends, keeping the peace, if you didn't know I'm being sarcastic) When you feel the crowd start to move Please try to resist the urge that you get Try not to get upset and sock your neighbor right in the face I know that coach meant well But what's a dance to you is a fight to someone else Keep your anger aside, kick back, enjoy the ride And think how it could be if you showed some courtesy (Your hostility, it grows so easily) [Chorus] You're the next victim of the dance that broke my jaw Please don't get near You're the next victim of the dance that broke my jaw Have some more beer, "No Fear Gear" is what you wear [Verse 2] Just because the music begins Does not always mean a wrestling scene from WWF Breaks out right to my left And I got a ringside ticket I'll challenge you or anyone anywhere Sometimes I just want the football thrown in Let the football game begin And then I say to myself as I think of someone else That's not what we came here for, we'll take no more [Pre Chorus] What's going through your head? To the point that someone is dead Keep it up and you're out of here, you're out of here And when you're outside by yourself and sitting all alone Keep your head down Cause we're the ones that warned you [Chorus] You're the next victim of the dance that broke my jaw Please don't get near You're the next victim of the dance that broke my jaw Can't we just be friends in here? [Bridge] Go drink some more beer Kick your neighbor's rear Elbow to my ear Can't we just be friends in here? [Verse 3] I was dancing by myself, and bothering no one else When suddenly I was encountered by the beast (Awoo!) I ask so politely, "please just let me be" But the next thing I remember, I'm staring at the ceiling Someone please, help me call security I'm on my feet, but now I'm on the floor That shithead doesn't show respect to me or to you So now he's out the door Now he's out the door Not gonna hurt us anymore That dance floor is free of hostility And I'm so glad he's gone It's our turn to have fun My message was clear, "We're all friends in here" But we're not allowed to do The dance that broke my, dance that broke my, dance that broke my jaw! (Ahaha Awoo! Awoo!) [Thomas F. Wilson] Doug! Congratulations on a fine performance, what do you call that music? [Doug Robb] Uhh, two coats of wax butt hair music [Laughing] [Thomas F. Wilson] Good for you, good for you! I- [Dan Estrin] You asked [Thomas F. Wilson] I- yes I did, yes I did A lot of us, Doug might have other words for, but that's ok, we'll go over that later There were Russian Cossacks dancing back there That last song we had a Polish teeterboard in the kitchen, it was amazing [Phone Ringing] [McDonalds Employee] We are McDonalds, can I help you? [Doug Robb] Yes, umm, I was in there earlier today and I had a Big Mac with some big fuckin' ugly, gross piece of shit in it or something and it made me awfully nauseous, ah! Umm who is this? [McDonalds Employee] Oh, can I get uh one second? [Doug Robb] Hello? [McDonalds Employee] Can I get uh one second please? Thank you [Doug Robb] Oh, ok Hm, hm Hello? McDonalds pick up the fuckin' phone! [Robert Matthew] Hello, it's Robert Matthew [?] [Doug Robb] Yes, Robert, um I was in there today and I got a Big Mac with some chunk of poopoo in it or something meatball or something in it, made me awfully nauseous, and I'm letting you know that [Robert Matthew] You got a Big Mac with meatballs inside? [Doug Robb] Yes, a big fat meatball Turkey I believe I don't know what it was [Robert Matthew] Alright, um [Doug Robb] Awful! Tasted like vagina or something, awful! [Robert Matthew] What's your name? [Doug Robb] Thelma [Robert Matthew] Excuse me? [Doug Robb] Thelma Thelma [Robert Matthew] What is your last name? [Doug Robb] Excuse me? [Robert Matthew] Last name? [Doug Robb] Thelma, um, yo bitch Jobitch, Thelma Jobitch, that's my last name [Robert Matthew] Ok, your phone number? [Doug Robb] Um 7-0-6 8-0-5-2 [Robert Matthew] 0-5-2? [Doug Robb] [?] Awful! [Robert Matthew] You're missing one number [Doug Robb] 7-0-6 0-5-2 [Robert Matthew] 2 what? [Doug Robb] Oh [Robert Matthew] Hello? [Doug Robb] Hello? [Robert Matthew] Last number? [Doug Robb] Ohh! as in "Ohh, that shit was awful" [Robert Matthew] Is this area code 8-1-8? [Doug Robb] 8-1-8 Awful! Mmm! Yes, my husband wants to speak with you because he got some SpaghettiOs or something in his- [Robert Matthew] His Big Mac [?]? [Doug Robb] No, in his um, Mc Nuggets Hang on Dear! McDonalds on the phone! [Dan Estrin] Yeah bitch, I'll be there, one second Yeah, hello, McDonalds in the house, what's up? Um, I got some uh SpaghettiOs in my uh chicken Mc Nuggets [Robert Matthew] [?] why don't you um- [Dan Estrin] They were awful [?] [Robert Matthew] Can you get those Big Macs [?] for a, for a [?] Big Macs that have no spaghetti meat balls on it? [Dan Estrin] Hmm!? [Robert Matthew] [?] so I can get you Big Macs that have no spaghetti meat balls in them [Dan Estrin] Ok, that's ok, yes, I really appreciate this My wife though, she's got a big ass, so I don't- [Phone Hangs Up]