Used to Love Her (Live in Tokyo / 1988)

Song Meaning

The lyrics to "Used to Love Her" immediately plunge into a stark, unsettling confession. A narrator declares they "used to love her / But I had to kill her." This opening establishes a darkly comedic tone, framing extreme violence as a regrettable, yet necessary, act of exasperation. The speaker's frustration is palpable, even after the deed is done. The central tension here lies in the chilling juxtaposition of past affection and present brutality. The act of murder is presented not as a crime of passion, but a practical solution to an unbearable annoyance. The narrator's decision to "keep her" by burying her "right in my backyard" further twists this logic, suggesting a possessiveness that transcends even death, or perhaps a desire to maintain a twisted form of control. The craft hinges on relentless repetition and a deadpan delivery of the absurd. The refrain "I used to love her / But I had to kill her" hammers home the core paradox, while the repeated complaint, "I can still hear her complain," injects a morbid humor. This detail is crucial; even six feet under, the victim's nagging presence persists, underscoring the narrator's deep-seated irritation and the futility of his extreme solution. The justification that "She bitched so much / She drove me nuts" elevates everyday relationship frustrations to a grotesque, violent climax. Ultimately, these lyrics are effective because they tap into a primal, if deeply twisted, fantasy of ultimate release from an irritating partner. The explicit framing in the intro as "a joke" about a "sick subject" allows the listener to engage with the shocking narrative from a distance. It's the unsettling blend of mundane grievances with horrific actions, all delivered with a darkly ironic shrug, that makes "Used to Love Her" stick in the mind, prompting a grim chuckle rather than genuine horror.