Song Meaning
The narrator is wrestling with a powerful craving, something they've promised their father to avoid. This internal battle manifests as a physical sickness, a clear sign of the struggle. The core of the track lies in this cyclical conflict: a past experience of having and losing, followed by a present, almost overwhelming return of that same desire. It's a confession of vulnerability, a stark admission of relapse.
The dominant tension is between a commitment to sobriety or restraint ("keeping it low," a promise to their father) and an irresistible urge. This isn't just a fleeting temptation; it's a recurring affliction, a sickness that signals the grip of the craving. The repetition of "I think I had it / I think I have it again" underscores the cyclical nature of this struggle, suggesting a pattern of falling and rising, or perhaps a constant oscillation between control and surrender.
The phrase "Vision corrected / For what I neglected back when" offers a crucial insight. It implies that the narrator's past actions, driven by this craving, led to a distorted perception of reality or a failure to see what truly mattered. Now, with the craving returning, their vision is being 'corrected' again, but this time it might be a correction towards acknowledging the severity of their relapse or the enduring power of the desire. The repeated "Again" amplifies the sense of inevitability and the exhausting nature of this fight.
This lyricism is effective because it captures the raw, disorienting feeling of reliving a past struggle. The simple, almost mantra-like repetition of the chorus makes the craving feel both pervasive and inescapable. It’s the sound of someone caught in a loop, desperately trying to break free while simultaneously succumbing to the familiar pull, making the internal conflict palpable and deeply human.
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