Mudd Club (Live At Mudd Club, NYC, May 8, 1980)

Lyrics

[Spoken] Alright, now bring the band on down behind me boys. We gotta make sure they hear the words to this song. Hey- Now wait a minute, not yet. Let me tell ya, the name of this song is "The Mudd Club", it's a song about the place in which you are now standing. Based on real events that actually took place here. Performed by real denizens of the area, some of whom may be in the audience tonight although we can't be sure [Chorus] Hey, they're really dancin' They're on auto-destruct On the floor, on the pipe Bouncin' off-a the wall Hey, the people here are really tearin' it up On the side, in the back By the front of the stage They ain't really crazy You can take it from me I should know cause I go every time I'm in town If you never tried it let me straighten you out It's the best kinda place to unfasten yerself [Verse 1] Mudd Club There ain't no sign in the front Mudd Club There ain't no sign in the back Mudd club Now people, if you don't go Then you won't know about the show On the floor, do you know what I'm talking about? [Spoken] Have you ever been down here, the early hours (Mudd Club), when it's pretty empty 'n you see these people, well, you see these people uh, you know those poles out there? I saw a guy run at that pole and stick to it for five minutes. I tried it this afternoon when we came in here and it's very hard to do! [Verse 2] Mudd Club Is all the way downtown The Mudd Club They ain't messin' around Just turn to the left and look around It's there somewhere Well, if you ain't found it, better hurry up Cause the folks down there is on auto-destruct And so can you be too The fact of the matter, it's made for you [Spoken] Try it on a Saturday about 4 o'clock in the morning. Or even on a Monday at midnight when there's just a few of them fabulous poodles doing the peppermint twist, for real. In a black sack dress with 9-inch heels, and then a guy with a blue mohawk comes in, the bass player from the Plasmatics in serious leather (At the Mudd Clubb) Al Malkin is here right now, ladies and gentlemen, looking for a virgin with nice breath. Now, I told him earlier that we were gonna raffle him off, where is he? Where? He's over there. Ladies and gentlemen, the-the, the pudgy guy with the curly hair, making a fool of himself against the wall. This is the guy that's looking for a virgin with nice breath. It doesn't matter whether you're a guy or a gal, he's all yours if you have nice breath and never did it before with anything other than furniture. Might be you, what are you talking about [Chorus] Hey, they're really dancin' They're on auto-destruct On the floor, on the pipe Bouncin' off-a the wall Hey, the people here are really tearin' it up On the side, in the back By the front of the stage They ain't really crazy You can take it from me I should know cause I go every time I'm in town If you never tried it let me straighten you out It's the best kinda place to unfasten yerself