Lyrics

[Intro] Hey now! Hey! Hey! Do you know what you are? You're an asshole! Asshole! [Verse 1] Some of you might not agree 'Cause you probably likes a lot of misery But think a while and you will see [Chorus] Broken hearts are for assholes Broken hearts are for assholes, are you an asshole? Broken hearts are for assholes, are you an asshole too? Whatcha gonna do, 'cause you're an asshole [Post-Chorus] No no no, yeah yeah yeah I said you are an asshole! [Verse 2] Maybe you think you're a lonely guy And maybe you think you're too tough to cry So you went to The Grape just to give it a try [Bridge] And Dagmar Without a doubt, the ugliest son of a bitch I've ever seen in my life Was his name One, two, three, four! The whiskers sticking out From underneath of his pancake make-up And yet, he was a beautiful lady Nearly drove you insane Let's talk about leather (leather) And so you kissed a little sailor Tex Abel, starring in the latest Shepperton Production Who had just blew in from Spain Sir Richard Pump-A-Loaf You sniffed the reeking buns of Angel The tale of a demented bread-boffer And acted like it was cocaine Cucumber pud annexed to a fine whole-wheat loaf You were dazzled by the exciting new costume of Ko-Ko Then on Tuesday night, Caesar's back in town In a way you can't explain Facing off in a no-holds-barred Tag team grudge match With Kona And so you worked the wall with Michael Three-hundred-seventy-nine pounds of Samoan dynamite Which gave your back an awful strain (Volcanic Hell) But you came back on Sunday for the Gong Show Next Thursday, teen town's finest [?] But you forgot what I was sayin' 'Cause you're an asshole, you're an asshole, that's right You're an asshole, you're an asshole, yes, yes You're an asshole, you're an asshole, that's right You're an asshole, you're an asshole [INterlude] Well, now you been to The Grape and you been to The Chest And now I think you know what you are, you're an asshole [Verse 3] You say you can't live with what you been through Well, ladies, you can be an asshole too You might pretend you ain't got one on the bottom of you [Bridge] But don't fool yourself girl, it's lookin' at you Don't fool yourself girl, it's winkin' at you Don't fool yourself girl, it's blinkin' at you That's why I say [Refrain] I'm gonna ram it, ram it, ram it Ram it up your poop chute (Corn hole) Ram it, ram it, ram it Ram it up your poop chute (Fist fuck) Ram it, ram it, ram it Ram it up your poop chute (Wristwatch Crisco) Ram it, ram it, ram it Ram it up your poop chute (Pud!) [Outro] Don't fool yourself, girl It's goin' right up your poop chute Don't fool yourself, girl It's goin' right up your poop chute Don't fool yourself, girl It's goin' right up your poop chute Don't fool yourself, girl It's goin' right up your poop chute Don't fool yourself, girl It's goin' right up your poop chute Don't fool yourself, girl It's goin' right up your Aw, I knew you'd be surprised