Lyrics

I'm going to die, I know I'm going to die I can tell because my pulse is so weak The pills, I, I took so many downers that I know this is the end for me You poor thing, you want us to fix your hair for you so you look good when they find you? Oh, would you? Sure, what do you want? A pony tail? A flat-top with fenders? I'm gonna die, Janet, I'm gonna OD So make me look good Listen, the best I can do is fix your hair So why don't you get up and wash that melted eye-make-up off your face Is it smeared? I've been crying so much It's so damn sad when you know you'll never see all your friends anymore Oh, every week, it's the samе old thing You're gonna die, you're gonna diе Somebody went out on you, somebody doesn't love you anymore How long you been a groupie? You should get used to romances which are so obviously cheap Listen, just in case you crash out And the imaginary rock n' roll newspaper from San Francisco Wants to get any pictures of you You'll look like you washed your face Really, it's better this way with a clean face People always think groupies are such dirty girls Wouldn't mind sort of fucking all three of them Look, over there (What?) He's doing it, he's watching us from the fake bandstand with the binoculars Who? The Englishness? The rivet boy The rivet boy? Where? Over there, wipe that stuff out of your eyes It looks like he's beating off Beating off, I knew he was a pervert Ooh, how exciting Hey, are you still trying to OD? Yes, this definitely is the end for me I feel so faint and so weak Good evening, honey That was the most imaginary collapse I've seen since last week Janet, do you think she's going to die? Are you kidding? Did you see her hit the floor? God, well, it was so obviously cheap, lift your head, honey I'm gonna die This time, it's real Listen, Lucy, we've gotta get ready for our big dance number We're going to the fake night club tonight Oh, everything's getting dim Why don't you tell her a story while you're putting your makeup on? Oh Listen, toots, I'm gonna make up a nice little fairytale for you Oh, the pills, the Mandrex, I took so many of them I'll tell you part of the story, and then you make up another part that goes along with it Once upon a time, there was a tall, handsome, muscular Dwarf With a very special Swedish apparatus That him and his friends would use in conjunction with Bold new surgical experiments Involving A bludgeon, a bottle of champagne And a Microwave oven From a Jumbo jet, one of the big jobs leased from Air Rangoon Which, when used correctly Can effectively increase the dimensions And fire-power of your Dick To the point where In some instances, it should be classified as a lethal weapon