Things Are Gonna Be Changing Around Here

Lyrics

[FRED, spoken] Honey, I don't understand This morning you were a doting, loving wife You made me breakfast, you got me coffee And you gave me a goodbye kiss Now you're like someone I've never met before Now, get me a beer and let's kiss and make up Because I've got some important work to do for the government! [JOYCE, spoken] Fred, try and get this into your thick skull I'm not broiling you a steak I am not getting you a beer And I am certainly not kissing you I'm afraid you'll have to get used to the nеw me, Fred 'Cause shе's not going away anytime soon [FRED] What happened to the girl I married? She doesn't seem to be here What happened to my perfect wife? Oh, when did she disappear? Where is the girl who loved and adored me? Where is the girl who never ignored me? Where is the girl who always knew what to say? Where is that girl and why did she go away? [JOYCE] Dearest, darling Why don't you shut your mouth? Sweetheart, pumpkin Your life is going south No more house that sparkles and gleams Will I broil your steak? In your dreams Sorry, Fred, but I get the bed And you're on the couch, my dear Things are gonna be changing around here [FRED, spoken] Honey, are you listening to yourself? [JOYCE, spoken] Yes, I hear me loud and clear. Do you? [FRED] What happened to the girl I married? She never acted like this What happened to the girl who smiled And greeted me with a kiss? Where is the girl who'd nurture and need me? Where is the girl who'd comfort and feed me? Where is the girl who'd bring me an ice-cold beer? Where is that girl and who is this stranger here? [JOYCE] Honey, dumpling Guess who has found her voice? Lover, sweet cheeks You've got a brand-new Joyce No more Joyce at your beck and call No more Joyce to give you her all Sorry, Fred, the old Joyce is dead So go get your own damn beer Things are gonna be changing around here [FRED] I feel like my wife is possessed I feel like she's under a spell She's like someone I've never met before [JOYCE] Oh, Fred, please don't be such a pest Joyce is coming out of her shell If you can't get used to it—there's the door [FRED] Maybe I'll go—I might leave you flat [JOYCE] Oh well, goodbye, ta ta, and all that [FRED & JOYCE] Where is the girl who used to love me Baby, snookums Lie by my side all night long? Time to be moving on Who is this girl who's cold as ice Sugar, peanut And when did it all go wrong? That girl you want is gone Who is this girl Just be calm Who mocks me and baits me? Don't bellow and bray Who is this girl No emotions Who scorns me and hates me? Please, they're passé Why can't the old Joyce Sorry, Fred Magically reappear? The life that you led is history now, it's What a predicament Clear [FRED & JOYCE] Don't want things to be changing Things are gonna be changing [FRED & JOYCE] Around here