Cocktail Time in Hell

Lyrics

It's cocktail time In the bowels of hell It's kind of hot and it's really full But don't worry pal, 'cause I saved you a stool It's happy hour At the pub in hell But am I alive or am I dead That 2-for-1 special is what she said 'Cause it's cocktail time In the bowels of hell Come on down, everybody's here Attila the Hun's drinking all the beer Castro's busy, selling cigars We got Elvis Presley behind the bar Your credit's good, have another swill A Jim Jones Kool-Aid or a George Bush-Mills A shot for Oswald, was that one or two John Wayne's spiking Ho Chi Minh's brew! It's cocktail time In the bowels of hell It's kind of hot and it's really full But don't worry pal, 'cause I saved you a stool And it's happy hour At the pub in hell But am I alive or am I dead That 2-for-1 special is what she said 'Cause it's cocktail time In the bowels of hell One more! (I'll have an Evel Knievel, son!) Two more! (Hey, gimme a Phil Collins!) Three more! (Molotov cocktail!) (Bonham and Bailey's!) Another round! One more! (Hey, a White Stallone on the rocks over here!) Two more! (Hey, let me get that Lizzy Fizz!) Three more! (And I'll try the Tricky Dicky screwdriver!) (Three Mile Island iced tea!) Another round! Gaddafi and Somoza out smoking dope JFK's saving a chair for the pope John Lennon just got a highball "Hey, has anybody buried Paul?" Churchill and Stalin got their lager and lime Mussolini and Hitler want their drinks on time Belushi's getting tanked, what a slice He just asked Trotsky to get some ice It's cocktail time In the bowels of hell It's kind of hot and it's really full But don't worry pal, 'cause I saved you a stool And it's happy hour At the pub in hell But am I alive or am I dead And the 2-for-1 special is what she said Now, the 2-for-1 special is what she said The 2-for-1 special is... (Damn, I've seen places that were dead before, but this is ridiculous.)