The Revolutionary Costume for Today

Lyrics

[EDIE, spoken] Oh, hi! Thank heaven you're here You look absolutely terrific, honestly Mother wanted me to come out in a kimono so we had quite a fight... (singing) The best kind of clothes for a protest pose Is this ensemble of pantyhose Pulled over the shorts, worn under the skirt That doubles as a cape To reveal you in capri pants You fashion out of ski pants In a jersey knit designed to fit The contour of your shape Then cinch it with a cord from the drape And that's the revolutionary costume for today To show the polo riders, in khakis and topsiders Just what a revolutionary costume has to say It can't be ordered from L.L. Bean There's more to living than kelly green And that's the revolution, I mean Da da da da dah... (spoken) Just listen to this: The Hamptons Bee, July, 1972: "The elderly bed-ridden aunt of former First Lady Jacqueline Kennedy Mrs. Edith Bouvier Beale..." My very own mother, can you imagine? "...and her adult daughter, Miss Edie Beale A former debutante once known as Body Beautiful Beale..." They called me Body Beautiful Beale, it's true - That was my whaddyacallit, my uh ... sobriquet "...are living on Long Island in a garbage-ridden, filthy 28-room house with 52 cats Fleas, cobwebs, and virtually no plumbing After vociferous complaints from neighbors The Board of Health took legal action against the reclusive pair" Why, it's the most disgusting, atrocious thing ever to happen in America! (singing) You fight City Hall with a Persian shawl That used to hang on the bedroom wall Pinned under the chin, adorned with a pin And pulled into a twist Reinvent the objet trouve Make a poncho from a duvet Then you can be with cousin Lee On Mr. Blackwell's list The full-length velvet glove hides the fist And that's the revolutionary costume for today Subvert the CrisCraft boaters, those Nixon-Agnew voters Armies of conformity are headed right your way To make a statement you need not be In Boston Harbor upending tea And that's a Revolution, to me Staunch! There's nothin' worse, I tell ya Staunch! (spoken) S-T-A-U-N-C-H (singing) Staunch women, we just don't weaken A little known fact to the fascist pack Who comes here for antiquing' Da da da da dah... (spoken) Honestly, they can get you in East Hampton for wearing red shoes on a Thursday? And all that sort of thing I don't know whether you know that, I mean, do you know that? They can get you for almost anything ? It's a mean, nasty, Republican town (singing) The best kind of shoes to express bold views Are strapless mules in assertive hues Like fuscia or peach, except on the beach In which case you wear flats When I stood before the nation At Jack's inauguration In a high-heeled pump, I got the jump On Jackie's pillbox hats Just watch it where you step with the cats! And that's the revolutionary costume pour du jour You mix 'n' match and, Presto! A fashion manifesto That's why a revolutionary costume's de rigeur The rhododendrons are hiding spies The pussy willows have beady eyes Binoculars through the privet hedge They peek at you through the window ledge with guile! We're in a Revolution! So win the Revolution with style! Da da da da dah