Birthday, Bitch!

Lyrics

[ZACK] Bet this really takes you back [KYRA] I could never find yours, Zack [NADIA] Excuse me [MATT] What the hell is that? [RORY] It's a piñata, Matt [LUCAS] Put it there instead [KYRA] You wouldn't want to hit your head [NADIA] I wrote a song for us to sing [ZACK] They'll be here any minute [RORY] I need tape [LUCAS] Got cups? [MATT] A plate? [NADIA] When I go like this, we'll begin it [RORY, NADIA & KYRA] Happy birthday, Ivy, you are the special birthday bitch [NADIA] We got you some Vagisil to help clear up that nasty itch [PETER] That's pretty, Nadia [ZACK] She'll love that [ALAN] Towels, stat [LUCAS] She's gonna die [NADIA] We should be so lucky [PETER] Be nice [NADIA] Why? [RORY, spoken] Mary Jane made some brownies They are dope [KYRA] My favorite [RORY] Mine too [LUCAS] Ooh, spacecakes [PETER] Cool, who made these? [RORY] Does he know? [LUCAS] Please [PETER] Know what? [ALAN] I need a cup [ZACK] I may have to crash here tonight There's no way I'm gonna make it home [NADIA] What the hell, the bed's still warm 'Cause Ivy never sleeps alone Same old gift from different givers Throw the dog another bone [MATT] Time to go [LUCAS] Sorry, bro [MATT] Are those her panties? [KYRA] Yes, indeed [LUCAS] Guess who's horny? [JASON (to Matt)] Him [NADIA, DIANE, KYRA & RORY] Agreed [LUCAS] Open shop, take all you need [NADIA] I would wear three [MATT] Maybe I'm not being clear [DIANE] They're here [LUCAS] Quiet [ZACK] These are so good [NADIA] Sing out, Louise [ALAN] Guys, where are all the cups? [PETER, JASON, NADIA, LUCAS, KYRA, RORY, DIANE, ALAN, ZACK, & TANYA] Shut up [NADIA] One, two, three, four! [PETER, JASON, NADIA, LUCAS, KYRA, RORY, DIANE, ALAN, ZACK, & TANYA] Happy birthday, Ivy, you're the ugliest of all You are the worst and most perverse to roam Cecilia's hallowed halls Your mother was a hooker and your father was a dick He poked her in the toaster and the pair produced a pig Whose brain is awfully tiny and whose ass is awfully big Happy birthday, bitch! Happy birthday, bitch! Happy birthday, Ivy Bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch [NADIA] Then they took that little bitch and they fucked her in the ass (spoken) Sorry [MATT, spoken] Happy birthday [DIANE, spoken] Matt planned the party [MATT, spoken] Some of it [IVY, spoken] Thank you, this is very sweet [MATT, spoken] She's loaded, what happened to her? [TANYA, spoken] You told me to keep her busy [PETER, JASON] (sung) You don't wanna play? (spoken) Nah, why are you so happy? (sung) I wish your piñata were that big (spoken) You do know those are pot brownies? Oops (sung) I want to go back to the rave The two of us dancing together Out there in the open So then what's stopping us now? I hear our song on the radio And I don't care who knows (spoken) Lower your voice (sung) What is wrong with you? I think we're missing so much Jason, I wish I could shout it Shout how much I love you [JASON, IVY, spoken] Hey Hey, you any good with a stick? Uh, what have you heard? Come help me Sure, give me one sec [PETER, JASON, spoken] Don't go Peter, stop God, but the rave— Was different We don't live at a rave Look, you have to stop acting like this Like what? Your boyfriend?